Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for January 03, 2016
Man: Ah, Haywires you have no idea how long I've waited for this moment! Rip Haywire: Are you still upset about that scar I gave you? It was years ago! Man: You destroyed my peripheral vision! I had to give up my basketball scholarship and go to trade school! And now I have the chance to ruin your life like George Lucas ruined "Star Wars"! Rip Haywire: Cobra? I came to save you, and this is the thanks I get? Cobra, you've always been my favorite back-stabber, but c'mon let TNT and the cute redhead go. Breezy: He said I was cute! Cobra Carson: Zip it, twerp. Breezy: You're just jealous cuz your hair is as black as lifeless as your soul! Cobra Carson: Rip, I can just get you out of this... just be my slave so I can be a proper pirate queen. It'll be fun! Rip Haywire: No-and it'll always be no! Cobra Carson: Why is making me happy so difficult for you? This is your stop, Haywire! Give my regards to sea quest: DSV.
Seaquest DSV was a TV show. It was cancelled decades ago. Perhaps the refrrence is too obscure