Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for September 13, 2011
Man: You're back from the Haywire house! Did the dame still have the keys? And did she finally replace those awful curtains in her room? Man: They key was there! River Jack will be most pleased, despite my bad news about the curtains! Pilot: Sorry, boys, we're grounded - big hurricane is headed directly into our flight path. Man: You will start the engines, amigo - Man: What's more dangerous right now - a bullet or some tropical winds? Pilot: Beverage service will be suspended, there's a $50 luggage fee for your guns, and nobody better sue me for whiplash afterward! Man: You should be a motivational speaker, Santo.