Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for April 01, 2010
Cobra: One time I stole a diamond on the French Riviera. He caught me, and made me put it back. That's when I knew he loved me. He could have had me jailed, but he kissed me instead. Chica: Why didn't you cut his throat and run with the diamond? Cobra: I thought I'd have more fun dragging out his misery.