Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for April 28, 2014
cherry blossom lore as early as 600 years ago american indian tribes living on the patowmack river recog-nized the unique charm of the cherry blossom tree indian 1: those things are going to attract kistch-starved tourists like flies. indian 2: and how. george washington, bitter over a childhood incident, detested cherry trees of any kind and had to be forcibly restrained afrom chopping them all down. aide: sir! don't! the tourism industry was a major contributor to your presidential campaign! george: ow! leggo! it would take a stack of 21, 467 pancakes to equal the height of the washington mon-ument if you made them with buttermilk.* *this is not cherry blossom lore. i'm sorry.