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Sometimes a dipstick is just a dipstick.
It’s the traditional sumo uniform.
What she says is how I have always felt about Darth Vader. I love this song, which imagines what would have happened if a longer lived Freddie Mercury had been consulted to help define Anakin’s prequel character arc. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpvlTVgeivU
Vader’s life story is pretty heartrending. This video imagines how Freddie Mercury, if he had lived to the 1999-2005 time frame, would have told Anakin’s story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpvlTVgeivU
My first post didn’t have enough space. Here is the rest of the song.
The X-Wings were picked off one by one.
The Death Star prepared for a new round of fun.
As it readied to launch, there was a great fluke,
All was blown up by a youngling named Luke!
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, perished in Yavin’s great fight!
The news reached the Emperor Palpatine,
He was never too nice, but this made him more mean.
The Rebels no longer deserved any slack,
The Galactic Empire would surely strike back!
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, martyr for His Majesty’s realm!
I find it amazing how many people think Darth Vader destroyed Alderaan. Even Dave Barry got this wrong. But Vader was standing by, not interfering with Tarkin’s order, even though Vader had voiced misgivings about the Death Star’s purpose. Tarkin isn’t recognised enough in Star Wars song parodies, so I offer my own, to the tune of “King of the Wild Frontier.”
Born on a mountain top in Eriadu,
A planet with jungles and a sky so blue.
’Twas his pioneer fathers’ colonial heaven.
Killed two blue lions when he was eleven!
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, son of the Outer Rim!
He fought all the pirates who passed by his home
Pulled his own weight in the War of the Clones.
He served the Republic with passionate fire,
Helped to create the Galactic Empire!
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, master of His Majesty’s fleet!
The Rebel Alliance began to increase,
Became a great threat to His Majesty’s peace.
Tarkin was assigned to a new occupation,
As Admiral of a moon-sized battle station!
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, Grand Moff of the Death Star!
A Rebel Princess arrived too late
To alter her planet’s terrible fate.
Although she agreed to play his game steady,
Tarkin simply said, “Fire when ready!”
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, destroyer of Alderaan!
The Rebels were fearful that their base would be next,
And so sought to alter the Whills’ cosmic text.
Darth Vader said “Tarkin, let’s put out a trace.
They may get there first, but we’ll win the race!”
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, taking an awful risk!
The X-Wings scrambled and flew through the trench,
The TIE Fighters threw them a lizard-monkey wrench.
“Sir,” said Chief Bast, “there’s a real danger here!”
“Evacuate?” asked Tarkin. “There’s nothing to fear!”
Wilhuff, Wilhuff Tarkin, would never desert his post!
Dogs and cats living together? Mass hysteria!
The video does have an air of being staged.