Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 15, 2016
Rat: Hi, Goat. This is Charles. He just moved into our neighborhood. Goat: Nice to meet you. Why'd you decide to move here? Charles: Just to get away from the people where I live. They weren't nice to me. Goat: I'm sorry to hear that. Charles: Yeah, it was pretty sad. But now I'm on some anti-depressants, so I feel a little better. Goat: Are you married? Charles: Oh no. No. No...I fell very hard for a girl years ago. But she didn't care for me. Goat: She didn't by chance have red hair, did she? Charles: Yeah. Why? Goat: Take off your coat. Good grief, Charlie Brown. Charlie: Middle age has not been kind. Rat: Wanna kick a football?