Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 13, 2006
"Who are you supposed to be?" "I am John McEnrat...It is my homage to the greatest tennis player in the history of the sport...John McEnroe." "Since when did you start liking tennis?" "Tennis?? Who cares about tennis???...This man was a PIONEER in the science of yelling at idiots." "If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna sit quietly over there and do my best Pete Sampras..." "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!!!" "I'm sorry, but I seem to have spittle in my soup again."