Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 18, 2004

Transcript:

"The Adventures of Angry Bob. By Rat." "Angry Bob was angry. He went to the zoo." "Bob bought a pretzel and a can of soda pop and sat on a green bench facing the monkey cage. The hungry monkeys stared at Bob." "'It is a good day for the zoo,' Bob thought. 'It is sunny and the pretzels are warm and the soda is refreshing.'" "'I am happy,' Bob exclaimed. 'I thought I needed booze or new houses to be happy, but I do not. All it took was a warm pretzel and a refreshing soda and a comfortable bench by the monkey cage.'" "A projectile struck Bob in the ear. A monkey screeched. More projectiles followed. Bob ran.." "...Straight into the path of the zoo's biannual 'Parade O' Elephants.'" "Bob popped like a grape and died." "Don't taunt monkeys."