Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 09, 2003

Transcript:

"What's all this?" "My Pit O'Useless Blowhards...I filter them out of society, and put them here, out of harm's way." Yeah, I'm Burt...I call talk radio shows and give my knee-jerk opinion on all issues because I am without a meaningful existence of my own." "And I'm Vivian...My car is plastered with over twenty bumper stickers because I think all other drivers need to know how smart I am." "I'm Chuck...I'm a sports nut and I believe that debating the high salaries of pro athletes is more important than life itself..." "This is wrong, Rat...These people are simply voicing their opinions...That's what makes a democracy work." "Yeah, this is Burt from Albany, and I think it was wrong to bury the zebra alive." "...For the money he makes, I'd have made A-Rod bury the @#*&#@ zebra."