Pat Oliphant for April 25, 2012
Mitt Romney: Hi! I'm Mitt, and I'm running for president. Who are you? Man: Hello, Meet. I am Jose, a Mexican immigrant. Please to meet Jew. Romney: Well, no, I'm not Jewish. I'm a Mormom. Although I do approve of Jews, of course... are you a legal immigrant, Jose? Man: Si. Romney: Good. I need your vote, and I'll tell you anything to get it. Anything! Man: OK, tell me, Meet - are Mormons real Christians? Dow Jew got a birth certificate? Can I see your 2011 tax return? Romney: Well, um, gee Jose... Aid: How are we doing with pandering to the Hispanic vote, chief? Romney: Not well. They know too much. Punk: For Mexicans, right, chief?