Garfield by Jim Davis for November 16, 2008
Scale: Greetings. I am a new state-of-the-art multifunction diagnostic scale. I not only provide digital and voice weight measurement to the ten-thousandth of a pound... But also body fat percentage, a muscle mass index rating, pulse reading, body temperature... ..oxygen, blood pressure, and blood sugar levels, HDL and LDL counts, and EKG measurements. Please step on. GREAT googly moogly!