Lads, lads- please! We're a dogs' choir- not a cats' chorus!
You could become a pipers’ regiment, you know…
Don’t know if this is true (and keep in mind, I love the Scottish warpipes), but I heard this story from a street piper in San Francisco: Once during the Crimean War, the Turks heard a Scottish regiment play the pipes as the British troops were approaching. The Turks figured anything that sounded that bad had to be invincible, and fled the scene.
So…maybe your human friends could use you in Iraq or Afghanistan or somewhere. Wear your protective gear.