Frazz by Jef Mallett for April 26, 2009
Caulfield: What would you call a medical condition...that made your heart race...caused you to burp something like swamp gas...turned your fingernails indigo...curled your toes (and not just from the swamp gas burps) and put a stain on your left buttock like one of those Mary Apparitions, except more like Kid Rock? Frazz: I don't know. Let's look it up. Caulfield: if I have to go to the library to write a fake excuse note, I might as well just do my homework.