The Born Loser by Chip Sansom

The Born Loser

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  1. luckychigger

    luckychigger said, 2 months ago

    Not quite yet . . . the smoke alarm hasn’t started blaring yet. Then it will be ready.

  2. plus4

    plus4 said, 2 months ago

    Never eat at a place where the smoke alarm serves as the dinner bell.

  3. aarondennis

    aarondennis said, 2 months ago

    Cthulhu? Is that yT̥ͅo̠͇̹̞̠̩͝ ̨̖į͖̦͡n͉̥̗̖̠̰̼̘͡v̢̨̮̹̲͇̳͞o̢̭̙̠͇͢k̥͖̝̪͝͝e̡̕҉̫ ̟͔̗͎͖̻͇t̸͓̜͉͜͡h͚̗͎͜e͔̭̲̪ ̫͉̦͙͇͇̀h͉̜̩̤̹̜͞í̩͈̻̪̼͖͕͟v̵̪͎e̮͓͚-͚̭͕̰̰̗̦m̫̪̻͎͉̲͓ì̢̻͍͈̳̮̪n̙̹d҉҉̷̙̥̪̠̼̫͓̪ ҉̟̩͓͖̤͝r̵̙͚e͏̤̠̀p̶̰̰̳͢r̰̼̜̰̭̠̰ẹ̩̱͉̞̪s̮͓̀ẹ̴̰̝ņ͓͍t̻̜̯̜̳̱̝͞i͏̨͙̮̩͓̳̯̱̫͟ń̡̙̹́ģ̧̳͍̮͚̖̠̕ ̵̷̝̹͍͓̝̙̜c̴̞͚̤̣h͇͓̗̖̲̤͘a̻͔̘͕̺͔̘ͅó̴͉͎̬̲͜s͞͏̯̮͉.̧҉̢͔̣͔͓̦
    ̗̻̳̲͎͚̦I̮̖͙̠ņ͖̠v͏͓̣o̜̳̺̕͘ḱ̖i̲̤̫̞̺͓̤͝ǹ̮͓̼͕̬͖̙̙͡g̴̻͠ ̺̹̖̤̠t̜̤̣̦̯̜̕h҉̴̨̥͕̥̟̳e̻̩̱ ̞̟̬̠̣̝͍̀͜͞f̠̙͓̣̻̼̭e͍̜̬͕͚̖̟͟e̷̼̲̦̩̹͇̘̼̺l̜͚̻͖̞̗͟͠ͅi̲̻̠͓̟n͍̤͇̘̘͚̜̜ǵ̵͏̮̠̺̯̠͉̱̩ͅ ͙̞̩͇͚͘o̺͓̺̮͜f̦̞̥͖̙ ̥̞͎̮͘ͅc̷̡͎̝͔̺͟h̤̪͓͢ą̛̦̻͙̺ͅọś̰͢.͙̱͓̲
    ͉͚̘̲̲̫W̷̩͇͟ì̮͇ţ̛͈̮̙̥͕̘̀ͅͅh͏̰̰ ͍͇͉͇͎̩̲͜ͅo͏҉̘͕͈͓̞u̧̹̗̤͖̻̭͡t̛̳͕̜̦͓̭͟ ̵̡̥̩̞̗͘ò̫̦͙͚͔̫̟͎ŗ̩͘d҉͡҉̘̳é̥͍̱̯͖̻͇̤͘ŗ̮̺̞͈̦̼̳̯͔̕̕.̧̡̰̱͓̻̙̞̬̥
    ̘͈̣̥͕̬ͅT̷̼̭͇͖̬̥̥h̪̘e̢̠̬͇ ̦̤͙̲̮̪̀N̶̛͉̝̺̳̙͡e̢̙͈̤z̟̦̜̫̩̫͇͖͡p͓̻̤̩̫̭̰͖e̲̺͎̼̩̮͍ŕ̷̠̫́ḏ̶̨̛̬̹̝̭̳̦͖i̳̘̠̠̪͢͡a̶̛̻̫̣̜̰̣ņ̻̬ ̻͔͢h̴̸̳͖͇͓i̥͓v̢̛͔̟̗̘̱̩͡ḙ̸͚̪̩͢ͅ-͇͜m̷̖̮͔̱̪͚͘i̭̗͟ǹ͍̹̫͖d͓̼͎̱͘ ̶̜̘͠o̡̧̥͡f̧͙͓͘͡ ̘̙̤͖̩͠ç̫ḫ̸̜͓̙̦̻͕̹͘a̸̫o̸͓̗̘̭͖͇̹s̸̖̝̜͎̝͢.̜̗̦̟̞̞̻́͢ ͅZ͇͖͘͘a͏̶͕̱̙̺̙̯̝̝ḷ̢͓̜̳͎͖͈g̡̤̤ǫ̴̫͈͉͉̞.͉̟́̕
    ҉̱̣͇̦̹̖͚̱́H̴̶͖̙ȩ̴͍̹ ̶̻͜͠w̢̯̭̭̳h̵̭̝̪͉͘o͈̥̠̳̺ ̶̪̤̥̲̠̣͍͇̕͠W̯̮̞̰̟̭͘͢ͅa͏̹̣̣̟͕i̠̮̰͕̲̟t͙̱̪̙̲̜̤̺̮s̻̱̹ ͉̘̱̟̯B̶̶̠̲͈̝͠e̛̯̬͓͚͘ͅḥ͓̟̱͇̮̜̹͉͟i̛͕̜̜̱ǹ̢̗̪d̤̙ ̬̕ͅŢ̫̩̕h̟̝̼̗̬͔͜e̠̠̤̜̩̬͖̕ ͏͙̗̥̺̩̲̰̤ͅW͖̮̥͍̤͎a͇̲̣̻ͅl̖̣͉͙̹̘̞̹̹͜l҉͎͍̺̼̥͓͇̭.̺͓̞̰̯̣͉
    ̪̤Z͏͈A̴҉̘̠̭Ļ̟̰̭̲͈̯͘͜G̨҉͙̠̱ͅO̯̟̺!̫̹̹̠̜͖͠

  4. bcathey1960

    bcathey1960 said, 2 months ago

    Cooking, just like at home…

  5. CARAPORAM

    CARAPORAM said, 2 months ago

    Seems like he ordered The Japanese Horror Flick special….

  6. John Smith

    John Smith said, 2 months ago

    Looks like my wife FINALLY found a job to suite her skills!

  7. Ramundo

    Ramundo said, 2 months ago

    He did, after all, order it well done.

  8. JoPhan

    JoPhan said, 2 months ago

    Last season, one of the contestants on Worst Cooks in America was selected because she burnt everything she cooked. (It was the only way she knew how to be sure it was cooked through.) She ended up winning.

  9. Jim Kerner

    Jim Kerner GoComics PRO Member said, 2 months ago

    I guess he wanted a burnt offering.

  10. comicsssfan

    comicsssfan said, 2 months ago

    Now the cook knows it’s ready.

  11. gopher gofer

    gopher gofer said, 2 months ago

    never eat at a place called Mom’s
    Nelson Algren

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