Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for March 10, 2021

Or as Michaelangelo puts it in TMNT Secret of the Ooze: Not to criticize science, but wouldn’t it be easier to call it the pink stuff?

Didn’t this thing once guest star on an old Star Trek episode with an especially lazy Deus Ex Machina ending?

Adventures of Marigold, Pre-Phoebe, that is, “pre-be”.

Aww, I was hoping for another beautiful unicorn.

I think I saw you on an episode of Star Trek. You know I was expecting a unicorn with braces. Did not think that pure energy could be a character . But after the ear worm I should expect the unexpected. Also I want to see a Unicorn in braces with a disco ball hat and rhinestone jacket.

I was thinking, with the “they/them” pronouns, we were going to have a non-binary unicorn.

I think Harry Potter once met Sparkleface in a hedge maze. They turned his whole world upside-down!

“Wow, I can’t believe it’s been 700 years. Did you hear about the Plague? And the Renaissance? After that, it gets really weird…”

What?!

Talking blob of sparkles would have worked.

Reminded of Humpty Dumpty’s comment on language: “The question is, which is to be master? That’s all.”

This explains the use of gender-neutral pronouns, because last I checked, sparkles don’t traditionally have a gender (and if they did, that only raises questions I’m not sure I’d want answered anyway :P).

im confused I thought sparkleface was one person not two. If he/she are one person then we have pronoun trouble

I suppose sparkles have to start somewhere.

Sparkleface eerily reminds me of that blood-devouring creature from an original Star Trek episode. So keep your vents closed, Phoebe!

Star Trek flashback!

Now why didn’t I consider that Sparkleface might not have been a unicorn?

The bees were never the same after they hit the electric fence…

So Sparkleface is of a different species of being.

Hmmmmmm… are those marigolds sparkles