Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for January 26, 2022

An automated subzero array distributor costs billions, whereas a snow catapult is only $15.

It’s a pretty good thing to use in a snowball fight, but we can’t have one of those in Florida.

A piece of military equipment the US sent to Ukraine to fight off the Russians.

Can we have some snow down under, it’s rather hot at the moment.

Sire. After all the wealthy people fled, they picked us clean of scientists.

It’s like the King (still) enjoys having a good snowball fight.

He just doesn’t want to have to work at it (too much – if at all).

Looks like the King visited the Dr. Seuss Universe and brought back something.

I want one!

Well, now you snows.

In the winter of 1963 in England, me mates an I would have ice fights with the Pete Moors gang that lived across the valley!

It was so cold that ice bits were the only thing to throw!

Why am I thinking of The Flight of the Valkyries being played on bag pipes?

That’s what you get for using a defense contractor from Whoville.

That’s nice, but can it play Scotland The Brave?

Waste in Defensive spending has always been a problem. Sadly that’s the way they built the Military Industrial Complex to take advantage of the cash that gets thrown into it.

Can it throw water balloons during the summer?

Like our military that still tries to build an all purpose aircraft that of course cannot only not do all things but indeed has failed at a lot of what it should be capable of to begin with. Like not crashing so often.

And with Putin Saber rattling yet again with tanks and troops on the Ukrainian border wouldn’t a tank buster/ground attack plane be a handy card to have in that poker game? Oh wait… Don’t we already have some of those that cost a miniscule fraction of the new plane and work just fine for that exact job? Why… Why, yes we do.

how much would Calvin give for one of those to turn loose on susie derkins?

It looks like a combination of a trebuchet and bagpipes.

The horns could be useful in bringing down the walls of Jericho. Somebody go find Joshua.

Was it designed by Dr. Seuss?

Seuss Industries.

Looks like the little known bag trumpet. the forerunner of the bagpipe.

Looks like Stewies Period Cycle from Family Guy. That episode where Meg fights with school bully.

At least until late March. Then we use a mud launcher.

It has potential. It’s a short step from here to the nerf machine gun. I mean really, if you can’t beat your enemies, don’t piss them off.

Finally found a good use for bagpipes.

At last! Something I can do with those old bagpipes I’ve got in the attic!

Looks like it plays the bagpipes too.

“Bagpipe-powered”?

Didnt I see that on the Grinch christmas movie?

Kingy probably had plans for you to soup it up with your magic…

Like something out of Dr Seuss:)

If, as it looks, that thing plays bagpipes, it will drive the enemy away in tears.

I wonder if Dill’s brothers from Cul de sac designed it.

Probably the last time King Fink buys weapons designed by Dr. Seuss!

It can also toss grenades. And the King put rocks and ice cubes inside the snowballs.

At least it went to a good cause and boosted the economy to boot.