Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for December 12, 2014
Transcript:
Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling So you're on the Paleo Diet because you want to re-create the healthy diet of your Paleolithic ancestors. But what WAS that diet? Well, the most health-conscious cavemen actually chose to re-create the diet of THEIR ancestors! Introducing...THE PLIO DIET! Australopith-cuisine The diet of our Pliocene epoch ancestors When fast food meant food that was too fast to catch! "3.5 million years ago, you either looked lean and fabulous, or you were in the jaws of a giant hyena." Charley, Spokes-australopithecine Day one. Ants on a stick. You'll know you're full when the stinging makes your mouth numb. Day two. Fighting a large bird for some rotting glyptodon* meat. Plenty of cardio, plus pound-shredding trichinosis. *Can substitute armadillo meat. Day three. Fruit, worms, and worms in fruit. Day four-six. Nothing. Day seven. Tree bark and grass. After three days of fasting, you'll be surprised how yummy non-caloric plant matter is! BEFORE AFTER THE PLIO DIET If you survive...you're fit!! PLIO DIET! In bookstores now! Also available etched on mussel shells.
For a related laugh enjoy this:http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-open-letter-to-paleo-diet-enthusiasts