Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for June 01, 2012
Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling Presents: News of the Times Obama Claims His Position on Gay Marriage Is "Evolving" President Obama's statement that his position on gay marriage is "evolving" ignited a controversy over the existence of political evolution. It is believed the evolution of political positions on gay marriage looks like this - The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam and Some Gay Dude. Civil Unions are okay, but marriage is man and woman. Personally, I'm fine with it, but it's a state issue. This is a basic civil right that must be protected. Okay, we got the marriage in, now we can push for our real agenda, mandatory gay sex for everyone! Figure 1. However, political creationists reject the entire theory of political evolution. Peter L. Schmidt (R) Kentucky Peter: Political views are what God, in his wisdom, puts in your head. And they are forever and immutable! Peter: For example, it has always been my position that there is no greenhouse effect, and nothing is going to make that "evolve"! Same with my position that Obama was born in Kenya! Yet political creationism is hard to reconcile with the fossil record. Scientist: Good lord! A quote from Mitt Romney saying he's PRO-CHOICE! Scientist #2: Wait. Even further down, I found one saying he's NOT pro-choice! The process that drives political evolution? Theorists call it "national elections," or survival of the fiscalest. Barack Obama: My position against gay marriage was preventing big donations...so it didn't survive to the next election.
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