Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for September 13, 2003
Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling ASTEROID! George W. Bush: You know why you've been called in! An ASTEROID 50 miles wide has been discovered to be less than a month from COLLIDING WITH EARTH! George W. Bush: We have to act FAST -- and each of you is a SPECIALIST, hand-picked to respond to this dire situation! George W. Bush: Jim Haler -- oil drilling expert! Jim: Yessir, President Bush! I'm ready for anything! George W. Bush: Get up to the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge in ALASKA and start DRILLING! We're gonna need LOTS of ENERGY to deal with this! Jim: Um...okay. George W. Bush: Daniel Tibman -- Constitution expert! Draft a bill giving the government unfettered surveillance powers! I wanna know who could try to sabotage our efforts! George W. Bush: Roger Kent -- tax expert! Get me new legislation slashing TAXES on the RICH! We don't need our most creative Americans hampered in this dark hour! Roger: Um...right! George W. Bush: And, yes, General! INVADE IRAN! We can't be blindsided by an extremist nation at this critical juncture! George W. Bush: There -- we've done all we can. Let us pray we're not too late.
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