Stone Soup by Jan Eliot for January 16, 2000
Val: What makes you happy, Phil? Officer Jackson: Ohh...fresh wax on my cruiser...a good stereo...almond croissants and fleece-lined slippers. Val: And "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens..." Officer Jackson: Fine, make fun of me. What makes YOU happy? Officer Jackson: A drive in the country? Val: Waste of fossil fuels. Destroys Ozone layer. Officer Jackson: Shopping? Val: Oh, please. Promotes needless consumption, and poor labor practices overseas. Officer Jackson: Fire in the fireplace? Val: Inefficient heat, air pollution!! Officer Jackson: Remind me - WHY do I like you so much? Val: Because I bring so much JOY to your life.