Rubes by Leigh Rubin for October 07, 2022

“But I’m a barn owl.” “Okay, crash into that big red building.”

My last couple of cars had antilock brakes, couldn’t make that happen. But, I could mat the gas pedal and burn rubber away.

But, what about people? the police? … It’s okay – they don’t give a hoot.

That’s not very wise, owl.

Hey Mr. Owl, how many feet is the breaking distance to get to the center of…oh, never mind.

And thus, they came to a screeching halt.

That’s my oldest. She doesn’t even lift her foot off the accelerator to let you know she’s seen it.

I call that the tooth chipper

The wiener mobile is found!