Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for May 23, 2015
Rip Haywire: So, your boyfriend... Breezy: He was bashing pirates the last time I saw him! But there were too many of them! I've got to rescue him. Will you help? Rip Haywire: Oh man, what a revolutin' development! Give me a minute... I think best when pummeling goons. Voice 1: Gaah! That was my gallbladder! Nooo! I need that hand to play racquetball! Voice 2: Nooo! I need that hand to play racquetball! Voice 3: I've never been punched this hard in all my days ! Voice 4: Don't jump off the cliff, I'm not done hitting you!