Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for April 21, 2014
R.J. Dicey, I can't stand keeping a secret from Rip! It's eating me up inside like an off-brand cola! Girl: No, R.J.: ?If Rip knows, he'll tell my brother Rodeo. And Rodeo can't know! The only way out of this is for you to fight oak tree McGee to the Death! R.J.: What was that sound? Girl: I didn't hear anything. Rip Haywire: It sounded like a large chin dropping in shock, horror, and agony. R,J,: It ws probably just a bear getting stuck in a beehive. Forget about it!