Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for February 01, 2019
richard's poor almanac by richard thompson undecided voter? lazy? clueless? ill-informed? you only have two days left! we'll try to help you. discuss your choices with someone you trust. guy 1: peee yooo guy 2: big time first hand knowledge of the candi-dates is good. hang around outside with a gormless, wishy-washy look on your face. they'll be all over you like a flock of cheap suits. children are our greatest resource & our hope for the future. what are they saying? kid 1: gore also spells ogre. this is a bad omen. kid 2: bush looks too much like charlie-in-the-box from the land of misfit toys in "rudolph the red-nosed reindeer." this makes him unfit to serve. you could study up on the candidates in some depth. compare their policies & records. measure the distance be-tween rhetoric & reality. in no time at all you'll slip into a zomboid coma & miss the whole election. but this is the coward's way out. if all else fails, try cosmic chance. the last sign you see on the way to your polling place is it. voter 1: gore bushbushgorebush gor bush nader goregorebushbush lost cat gore bush buchanan gore yard sale bush gore bush bush gore lose weight gore gutter cleaning voter 2: gutter cleaning it is!