Recent Comments

1. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   I remember looking into a problem and making a detailed proposal on how to correct it and how long it would take to pay for itself and my boss shut it down. I asked him why he bother to have me look into it if he was just gonna shut it down and he said “You have no experience in this field of engineering.” So he hired a consultant who came in and strangely the first thing he wanted was to talk with me about what I found out in my investigation. I told him that my boss had the only copy of the report and he’d have to get it from him. Which was a lie but I wasn’t gonna do the guys’ work for him and watch him get paid tons-o-money for something I’d already looked into.Sure enough, my boss gave him the report and I swear all he did was put it on his letterhead and put his signature on it. Picked up a fat check and leftSo I asked my boss when I saw the report and could quote it practically word for word and I asked him what was the difference except letterhead and signature. Then my boss said, just as calmly as he could, “He’s a real expert and knows what he’s talking about, you aren’t.”A month later I handed in my resignation and I thought he was gonna flip out. Then demanded to know why and I told him, I have it on excellent authority I don’t know anything."

2. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   That was you!? You Bastard!!!

3. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   Office supplies ordered once every third year and are consumed as soon as they hit the loading dock. They rarely make it to the official office supply cabinet.

4. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   Yeah, no one expects the engineers to know how to do anything. I went to one where we had to life four fifty pound bag up a flight of stairs. We had access to all manner of tools and stuff. When we finished, it took us about three minutes and he couldn’t believe it he went in and saw everything moved and placed as instructed. We never told her about the freight elevator behind the stairs, and no one else found it.

5. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   I had a friend who when his company installed computers on everyone’s desk and gave them email capability his department manager put out a memo that all emails were to be printed out and copied so they could be delivered and stored for future reference. Any notations made to the copies had to be added to the original email by the person who originated the email and copies of those mark ups copied and stored with the original.I swear he showed me the email at lunch one day and I had to ask if it was real. He shook his head and then later his department manager left for greener pastures.After a memo like that, I could see his boss telling him to start looking for another job.I think the thing that got me was his secretary didn’t try to stop him, she typed it up submitted it for his approval and distribution and she distributed the daylights out of it.

6. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   It’s so true. Genetics can be a horrible thing.

7. over 3 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   Yeah, I keep hearing about those. Knew a couple people who did have them, lucky bastards.

8. almost 4 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   Hey! I ran into Jennifer Lawrence in the Whole Foods in Atlanta, right after I moved here. I saw her and for some reason she looked familiar but I couldn’t place her and she caught me staring at her and I was embarrassed and tried to look cool. So I went about my shopping and ran into her again and again she caught me staring like a dirty old man, that I actually am but she didn’t know it And I went on again and finally the third time she caught me and I walked over and I said, “I’m very sorry, it’s just that I just moved to Atlanta and you look so familiar to me it isn’t funny. I give you my word I’m not a pervert.” And she snickered and she came in close and said, Did you ever see “The Hunger Games?” Then suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks who she was and I put my head down and said, “Holy Crap! How did I miss that.” Turned out the caterer on set didn’t know she was gonna be there and she had to run go get something to eat. I said, “Don’t you have runners for that sort of thing?” She laughed, “Not yet, but one day maybe.” I told her I did want to out her and she asked if I wanted a selfie with her and I said,“Honey that will clue everyone in here that you’re someone special. It’s great meeting you, love your work, just keep doing what you’re doing.” I have heard she has trouble with people meeting her in public but that’s due to people outing her and drawing a crowd and she can’t just be a regular person for a bit.So you never know, Dilbert. Cindy Crawford might show up and she just gotta have her some of you.

9. almost 4 years ago on Dilbert Classics

   I recall in the mid-eighties the company bought a whole bunch of new computers and even bought top Managers computers for their home and “personal” use. Anyway, they were all just ecstatic about getting these free new computers and were all just making sure to rub all the underlings noses on it and so I said to one who was going on about how he was obviously loved by the company.I said, “The company doesn’t love you.” He smiled, “Well, do I detect a note of jealousy from you Mr. Engineer? Did the company buy you a new personal computer?” I smirked at him, “Bless your heart, you don’t even know what a fool you’re being played for, do you? The company doesn’t give a rat’s ass about you or your family or your timer off. They are putting an extension of your office in your home and you’ll be answering emails and working from home, twenty-four-seven like the slave the company think you are and you think it’s a gift. You can keep that gift.”Initially he just walked away but about two weeks later I started hearing that suddenly the computer for home idea was suddenly being turned down by Manager after manager. Imagine that?

10. almost 4 years ago on Dilbert Classics

    It was, I met him in the mid eighties when he came to work for my company as a temp for a project. Back then it took about a year to get your first Social Security check, so he was just working until that started happening. Lord he told us all kind of stories about that place. Some I couldn’t believe but later heard them from another source, so?