So do other people’s interests and values go so far as to mandate a change her personal appearance? You brought up grooming and attire. Clearly you have an issue. Just say it.
That is terminology. When an operation goes badly and a patient dies, there is always a review. Doctors are not presumed guilty or innocent, the details are reviewed by peers and a determination is made. Insurances review details and in this case the fire department did an investigation. IRL those people literally know how to find the ‘smoking gun’. “evidence of no wrongdoing is insurance-speak” for nothing to see here.
I guess it is all in how you feel about the card. Cards are nice but the card to her was not as important as what he said to her, hence her next move.