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  1. 11 months ago on Ripley's Believe It or Not

    Should we believe Mr. Graziano, or Wikipedia? Not sure. But the Jack Daniel story is questionable. From Wikipedia: Daniel died from blood poisoning in Lynchburg on October 9, 1911.1 An oft-told tall tale is that the infection began in one of his toes, which Daniel injured one morning at work by kicking his safe in anger when he could not get it open (he was said to always have had trouble remembering the combination).9 However, Daniel’s modern biographer has asserted that the story is not true, offering evidence that Daniel raged on the safe a few years before dying of unrelated gangrene.12

  2. over 3 years ago on Peanuts

    I’d rather be a sparrow than a snail

  3. about 5 years ago on Alley Oop

    Hey, look at that – people still remember me! Thanks guys! Russell alerted me to the fact that I was mentioned here. I would love to be the new writer, of course I would start right in with my “Alley meets the Glarbs!” story. But there’s pretty much no chance. The Benders have the strip locked up and won’t even talk to me. I even paid $1 to send an email directly to Carol. She never replied. Too bad. One adventure I would have, maybe the first one, is Alley Oop meets Donald Trump! That would be fun!

  4. about 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    Instead of having Dinny take his family to a safe place, far away I presume, wouldn’t it make more sense to have Dinny fight Lem? I think one irate Dinny could take on all of them.

  5. over 6 years ago on Dilbert Classics

    How did Dilbert get to be a foot taller than the boss?

  6. over 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    Corrigan is doing everything he can but things have gone too far and he just cannot reach Godzilla’s mind. NOT FOOD, NOT FOOD, DON’T EAT – he screams out his desperate mental images! Godzilla will have none of that. “Faster, faster!!” Alley screams at his dolphin friends while water skiing on his bare feet!! But the dolphins are already doing everything they can. Sheldon the terrified, wrapped around Alley’s neck, peeks out and sees death only moments away. If only Alley could dodge that gaping mouth - here it comes!!! Sheldon taps Alley on the right side of the neck hoping to be understood. WHAM!! Godzilla chomps down just as Alley skirts to the right - he understood!!

     Somehow Alley knew what that tap meant and he swings wide to the right denying Godzilla of his tasty snack.  Godzilla has descended thinking he had a meal in his jaws.“What, no meat?” the fish thinks as it tastes only water. “How did that happen?”He ascends to the surface and spots Alley a short distance away.“Oh, there’s my meal over there!” and he roars after them, this time approaching from the right. Sheldon, overwhelmed with terror, sees it coming back for a second try. The giant mouth opens again. It’s almost on them. He can see the remains of Glarbs in its spiked teeth! Godzilla lunges forward and chomps just as Sheldon taps Alley on the left! This time its jaws snap shut so close to Alley, as he darts to the left, that Sheldon feels the wind from its chomping mouth! And again Godzilla submerges without its meal. Godzilla angrily ascends and chases after them! What a fantastic scenario is taking place!A tap on the right and Alley swings to the right as the action repeats itself!A tap on the left and Alley darts to the left as its gaping maw is once more robbed of its prize! It’s an unbelievable and astonishing scene going on, but really, how long can the fish keep missing? Not any longer. Godzilla descends deep into the sea. For a moment, all is quiet. “Where is it, Sheldon?” Alley shouts. He’s not getting any taps. Godzilla has descended a hundred feet down and is now on its way up – right below them! “Sheldon – where is it?!!” I have no idea, thinks the terrified Tribble. Like a rocket blasting off, the giant fish once again opens its jaws and heads up and up towards its prey. And there they are! Only ten feet above and there’s no escape this time!!  Rocketing up from below it’s impossible for our friends to know where Godzilla went. With its fantastically huge mouth wide open the monstrous Godzilla fish makes a final lunge and eats Alley and Sheldon in one gulp!!! The tow line snaps and the two lead dolphins take off! Relieved of Alley’s weight the dolphins can now outrun Godzilla, but it’s too late for our friends, as they swish down the ugly, stinking mouth of their predator!

  7. over 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    Here is the last posting of this story. Anybody who wants to read it to its conclusion can email me at larrythorowitz@yahoo.com. I’m just not comfortable giving it away so publicly and I also think some of the commentors have a point, meaning, there are other sites more appropriate for fanfiction. Nighty feels differently and I respect his opinion as well. To each his own.So anyway, here we go! It’s a long posting today, but it’s very exciting and it’s the last one to be posted here at the Bender’s site. Yes, I have received quite a few requests at my email mentioned above and you guys will all continue getting the daily postings!

  8. over 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    I don’t want to give away the ending so publicly and have it out there for years and years.

  9. over 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    I think I’m going to take my story elsewhere. I will email the daily postings to anyone that wants it. Just drop me a line at larrythorowitz@yahoo.com and I’ll continue sending them to you until its conclusion. Originally rgcviper had asked to rerun it and I said sure. But I’m aware that someone could steal it and it really has a fantastic ending which I don’t want to make so public. And it’s too good to share a small little space here in the comments section with the Benders watered-down version of Alley Oop. Tomorrow will be the last posting here.

  10. over 6 years ago on Alley Oop

    Corrigan’s ethereal heart drops.Oh, my God, what have I done, he thinks. Things were going so well and then this, now Alley is going to get eaten by this big fish that he delivered.  For it was Corrigan who came up with the idea for the dolphins to tow Alley. When he put his mind to it, he found that he could send thought pictures to any thinking animal, not just man or Glarb. And when he saw the boat of soldiers gaining on Alley he was the one who went searching out in the sea and brought back the Godzilla fish that just ate a boat load of Glarbs.  Unfortunately, this monster is not that intelligent and communicating with it trying to get it to NOT eat something is infinitely more difficult than putting a picture of food before it and getting it to chow down. Well, Corrigan is new at this and hasn’t really got the idea to think things all the way through to their conclusion. And it looks like it’s going to cost Alley and Sheldon their lives!  Try as he might Corrigan cannot veer off the monster fish that he summoned. Frantically he sends picture after picture of NOT FOOD to the creature, but it cannot be fooled – it smells Alley by now and just fed on some yummy Glarbs. The Godzilla fish darts straight at Alley at full force and opens its cavernous jaws ready to pounce!  The dolphin beneath Alley’s feet vaults high into the air as Godzilla lunges and chomps, but it only gets water! The dolphin comes down and after a moment dives to the depths in self-preservation leaving Alley water skiing on his bare feet!!   With no dolphin under him Alley has no refuge for the next lunge. He could be standing still for all that matters, there won’t be a way to escape Godzilla again.  And here he comes!! Godzilla roaring along with his mouth open wide, now two feet from our hero, he can feel its hot breath on his neck!!!