OK…this one took me a minute to get…but get it, I did. Bravo.
Even “have it your way” places have their issues. For instance, whenever I go to Subway, I order my bread, meat, cheese…and nothing else. I quite clearly specify NO veggies and NO mayo. Inevitably, their response is almost always, “Are you sure?”
Years ago (around 1983 or 1984-ish), my husband had an emergency surgery due to appendicitis (his high pain tolerance caused him to ignore the discomfort until it actually started leaking). Bill Cosby’s “Himself” was showing on cable & my father-in-law had recorded it so my husband could see it. I advised my husband to wait to watch it until he was a little better recovered. When I thought the time was right, I pulled out the VHS. Guess what? The time wasn’t right…and he had to go back in & get restitched.
Yup…that’s New Hampshire in a nutshell…
Side note: My older daughter & I watched “The Fellowship of the Ring” the other day. When we first put in the DVD, a message flashed that the DVD was “dirty”, so I cleaned it. After that it played fine, but at one point in the movie it would sometimes “pause”…just for a moment. When it got to the part where Boromir says, “One does not simply walk into Mordor”, it paused…right at the point of the famous “meme” picture! She & I couldn’t stop laughing.
I know I’m odd; the only things I ever put on my hot dog is cheese and celery salt.
I have a naturally sarcastic tone to my voice, so I usually have to specify when I’m NOT being sarcastic.
I once asked my husband to grow a mustache for me. I like mustaches. He tried. However, even though his hair is dark brown – almost black – his mustache grew in clear! It resembled the stuff they use to make whiskers for stuffed animals. It grew in nice, soft, and thick…but invisible. I managed to get a glimpse of what he would look like when the light hit it just right. He looked great. I then told him that, he could get rid of it if he wanted to.
One day, when I was about 30, I was visiting my parents. My mom, aunt & I took a walk. At one point, my aunt stopped & said, “Karen! You have grey hairs!” This wasn’t news to me, so I simply said, “Yes.” My aunt then called my mother, who had walked aheaad, “Theresa! Come here! Karen’s got grey hairs!” Mom came back, and they both started looking through my hair. Suddenly, my mother said, “Well, now you’re going to have to color it.” My answer: “Excuse me…I don’t ‘have’ to do anything.” That was about 20 years ago, and I’ve never colored my hair.
It looks like a little step stool my husband bought me when we first got married. One time I was making dinner for us & a friend, and I needed something off the top shelf. Our friend was 6’4", so I asked him to get it for me. My husband said jokingly, “I spent good money on that d*mn stool, you’d better d*mn well use it!” From that day, over 30 years ago, to this, we still call it “the d*mn stool”. Yes, we still have it.