Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 05, 2024

  1. Ding a ling
    BasilBruce  about 2 months ago

    There will be no non-handicapped parking spots anywhere.

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    oldpine52  about 2 months ago

    From what I’ve observed, at least half of all people with handicap placards must be mentally handicapped.

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    tudza Premium Member about 2 months ago

    If it keeps him away from where I park, I’m for it.

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    sirbadger  about 2 months ago

    Is there a narrow zone between smart enough to pass the driving test, and stupid enough to qualify as handicapped?

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    Gent  about 2 months ago

    Does disability to parallel parking counts too?

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    Kitty Queen  about 2 months ago

    We’re going to need more designated parking spots.

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    B UTTONS  about 2 months ago

    If that qualifies as a disability, no wonder we have a glut of politicians.

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    iggyman  about 2 months ago

    You are not alone, Pig!

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    Concretionist  about 2 months ago

    Around here, in the real world, you have to get an actual factual doctor (who is on the DMV’s actual list of licensed doctors) to give you a form letter that they’ve signed… WITH an end date (which can be “never” in some cases). Then you have to take that to the DMV office and wait an inordinate amount of time to see a clerk who may or may not decide to issue you with a placard allowing you to legally use the handicapped parking spaces. There’s a University here, with a football team. The team doctor can issue such letters, and the coaching staff has a gofer who will do the waiting… IF you’re on the team and have a sprained pinky or something more realistic. Most of the folks I see using said spaces are athletic looking young men, but perhaps 20% of the time it’s someone who more clearly needs it.

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    Indiana Guy  about 2 months ago

    I’ve seen some abusers of handicapped plates. I personally know of a woman who has a handicapped plate, parks in a handicapped spot, then proceeds on her daily walk of 4-5 miles. I also know of another woman who has a handicapped plate (because her husband is homebound and handicapped), then parks in a handicapped spot at where she works. That makes things difficult for those who are actually handicapped.

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    happyinvenice23  about 2 months ago

    Trump on the news this morning that “Never stop lying” has become his Motto!

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    Schark80 Premium Member about 2 months ago

    Bill Engvall created “Here’s your sign.” Is that the same as a handicap tag hanging from your rear view mirror as your driving? Note: it says on the handicap tag “Do not hang this while driving.”. Thanks Bill!

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    Kveldulf  about 2 months ago

    Pig really is dumb as rocks. He doesn’t have a car.

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    The Orange Mailman  about 2 months ago

    Insulting rocks first thing in the morning.

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    potfarmer  about 2 months ago

    Pig dumb? He’s had some of the pithier quotes in this strip.

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    sams1960 Premium Member about 2 months ago

    They don’t make enough placards for everyone that needs one for that disability…

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    basspro  about 2 months ago

    It must be true because the line goes “Dumb as a box of rocks.”

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    akachman Premium Member about 2 months ago

    Being kind and hopeful is not dumb. Love you, Pig.

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    franki_g  about 2 months ago

    one who is dumb as rocks

    should also be one who walks

    we don’t need bo(u)lder drivers on the road

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    Ellis97  about 2 months ago

    Handicap placards? Never heard of those.

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    Packratjohn Premium Member about 2 months ago

    I think it was George Carlin who pointed out that the way we drive, it’s a wonder all parking spots aren’t for the handicapped.

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    awcoffman  about 2 months ago

    At least Pig knows he’s dumb. Too many dummies think they’re smart.

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    ladykat  about 2 months ago

    That could work.

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    aerotica69  about 2 months ago

    People who are dumb as rocks need a special tag that makes them park at the far end of the lot. Obviously this would also include the subset of drivers of jacked up trucks who believe they are entitled to two parking spaces.

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    oish  about 2 months ago

    Joe Piscopo once played the iconic villain Vermin in the movie Jonnie Dangerously. In on scene he parked in a handicap spot and put up a “psychotic” placard

    Youtube : 5zyNkSsA3-s

    You only need to see it once…

    Once!

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    edwardhayworth  about 2 months ago

    We’re going to need a lot more disability parking spaces.

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    Goat from PBS  about 2 months ago

    Well, at least he admits it… I guess…

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    hooglah  about 2 months ago

    Unfortunately, too many get the handicap placards that don’t need it. They are just lazy. Splinters in your butt from sitting on it all the time does not count as a handicap.

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    awgiedawgie Premium Member about 2 months ago

    Judging from many of the comments here, a lot of y’all deserve to become disabled so you’ll finally learn some respect for those who are. Just because you can’t see someone’s disability doesn’t mean they don’t have one.

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    CptnSpldng  about 2 months ago

    Possibly morally handicapped.

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    Queen of America  about 2 months ago

    I have one because of my leg. I need my door to open all of the way to get it in. If I’m driving, I will use a handicap space just for that. If my husband is driving, he can let me out at the door or back out of a space so I can get in. One time, a friend and I left a restaurant and people had parked on both side of me so closely that I couldn’t get in. I had to have my friend squeeze in and back out for me.The ones I hate are the people who can’t seem to park straight. I think their handicap is that they’re blind. I’ve seen them park diagonally across the stripes. Or in front of the store and leave the car there! One time, we were in a regular spot and some old person parked in front of us all cattywampus so nobody could park on either side of her. She got out and I yelled at her asking her if she was going to just leave her car like that. She got back in and reparked.

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    Holden Awn  about 2 months ago

    While there are people who deserve / require handicapped parking, I’m struck by how outnumbered they must be by the number of people who believe themselves handicapped and in need of special parking. Our Drs. feed into the issue — they won’t stand up to demanding patients and say, “Get out of your car and walk — it will be good for you”, they will instead fold up and supply the ‘disabled’ documentation. Plus, while the handicapped deserve equal access, they do not necessarily deserve special, priority access; we have yet to figure out how to attain ‘equal’ but not ‘special and priority’.

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    SheMc  about 2 months ago

    Oh dear, they will have to allot more & more parking spaces if that’s the case!

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    zeexenon  about 2 months ago

    Worked for me, except the part of convincing my doctor.

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    ChazNCenTex  about 2 months ago

    I’ve been taken for granite a few times myself.

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    petecocker  about 2 months ago

    Our ballot here has a long list of who can’t vote. One line says: “Idiots and insane people”.

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    petecocker  about 2 months ago

    We knew a nurse with a mirror hangtag but was not handicapped. She claimed medical people were exempt!

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    ncorgbl  about 2 months ago

    Each state has it’s own laws, as driving is a privilege, not a right. In the state I live in, the disabled placard is strictly enforced not only requiring a doctor’s evaluation, but allowing police to question those who do not appear disabled.

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    kendavis09  about 2 months ago

    Ronnie Millsap and Mr. Wonder both have those.

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    William Stoneham Premium Member about 2 months ago

    As a person with a handicap, I can attest that some of my fellow handicap drivers fit Pig’s criteria when they leave their carts in the empty handicap space they’re parked next to or when they can’t manage to park within the lines of oversized handicap parking spots.

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    paldec  about 2 months ago

    Some of these comments almost sound like people are jealous of those with disabled parking placards. Don’t worry, if you live long enough you may well get your chance to have one too. Better hope your disability is obvious to the casual observer, or face the wrath of the irritated (irritating) who live to catch others doing something wrong.

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    wildlandwaters  about 2 months ago

    most people on the road are…

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    Curiosity Premium Member about 2 months ago

    I understand why Pastis does this, but he is doing a disservice to pigs. They are actually surprisingly intelligent, one reason it is difficult to keep them in an area you want them and out of areas you don’t!

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  44. Whatever
    unfair.de  about 2 months ago

    Still missing the ruhtlessness, the inherited money, and the delusions of grandeur to become a Republican shoo-in for the white house.

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    sincavage05  about 2 months ago

    Better print up a gross, the demand is there.

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    Laurie Stoker Premium Member about 2 months ago

    Dang! I could have gotten my disabled placard a lot sooner!!!

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  47. Download
    Walter Kocker  about 2 months ago

    May I introduce you to your next earworm?

    No, not the RFK Jr kind – so don’t worry.

    Youtube: 3BrCvZmSnKA

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    Katje  about 2 months ago

    Remember: half the population of this world has below-average intelligence…

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    _lounger_  about 2 months ago

    to all the rocks out there… I’m just saying

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    Swirls Before Pine  about 2 months ago

    Pig’s caught in a “Catch22”. If you are intelligent enough to know you need a disability placard because you are as dumb as rocks, you are not dumb as rocks.

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