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Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 03, 2021

200 Comments

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    BE THIS GUY Premium Member 2 months ago

    He may be ahead of assassins but he’s behind mimes.

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    Aldew Yellowson  2 months ago

    Good news: Stephen Pastis will only have to wait 86 years to get the vaccine!

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    BasilBruce  2 months ago

    Are anti-vaxxers anywhere on the list?

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    TEMPLO S.U.D.  2 months ago

    I guess I’m in the third group (being an employee of a grocery store)?

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    Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member 2 months ago

    With Italian prorities and shots per day I hope for the end of the year…maybe.

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    sirbadger  2 months ago

    Standing between assassins and something they want is the most dangerous place to be.

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    Baarorso  2 months ago

    Maybe Pastis is at the bottom of the vaccination list because he’s a lawyer=at least by training.;-D

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    B UTTONS  2 months ago

    That’s why we pun for fun.

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    Robin Harwood  2 months ago

    Unfair to assassins.

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    Concretionist  2 months ago

    Biden thinks we’ll be able to get everyone in the US vaccinated by end of May. That’s 90 days….

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  11. The rat
    Ratkin  2 months ago

    I’ve been pun-ctured twice. I’m good to go.

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    ronaldspence  2 months ago

    I think we should expose everyone to the 2020 New England Patriots, they couldn’t catch ANYHTHING!

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    PICTO  2 months ago

    You’re lucky you aren’t ahead of proctologists…

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  14. Iu
    Wasa Bista  2 months ago

    Wait till you find out restrictions stay in place whether you vaccinate or not.

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    Gent  2 months ago

    Y’ mean the wise assassin on the hill?

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    gopher gofer  2 months ago

    i find it hard to believe that stephan actually profits from puns…

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    seamusrmacdonald  2 months ago

    Why? What’s wrong with a good old fashioned assassin?

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    Yontrop  2 months ago

    Don’t worry Steph, the largest group is “Others” and it won’t be too long.

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    Qiset  2 months ago

    Some here in the US want to put assassins at the top of the list.

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    Doug K  2 months ago

    And the difference between “those who profit from puns” and “assassins” is …

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    backyardcowboy  2 months ago

    Steph’s down there because his puns assassinate good taste.

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    nosirrom  2 months ago

    I’m curious. When they had vaccination clinics for first responders did they play this song?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XiYUYcpsT4

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    franki_g  2 months ago

    IIRC, there have been occasions where Mr. Pastis has been made a Prophet in puns.

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    SALUDADOG  2 months ago

    So he’s being pun-ished?

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    wilhemenacooker  2 months ago

    or you could dress up in granny clothing with a wig

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    zerotvus  2 months ago

    sorry pal you missed politicians at number 1…..

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    kartis  2 months ago

    I thought Stephen would be first to get needled.

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    tripwire45  2 months ago

    Funny how politicians seem to be considered “essential.”

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    dnie  2 months ago

    = 40% of Americans = their Choice, not yours

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    EllisAmirRogersArcher  2 months ago

    How many times to I have to tell you? No more puns!

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    Zebrastripes  2 months ago

    Wonder if the gang will get their shot? Rat and Pig will probably throw a hissy fit, but Goat will! The crocs won’t but Zeeba will! AND Pigita already had her first one…..so there you go!

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    colddonkey  2 months ago

    You can have my place Steph, for the first 4-5 years.

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    monya_43  2 months ago

    I’m in Group 2, but can’t find a place to receive the vaccine within an hour’s drive each way. Also, I live in Texas. People haven’t been vigilant about wearing masks regardless of mandates, so lifting the mandate won’t matter any.

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    Jeffin Premium Member 2 months ago

    He needs to get his ahead out of his assassins.

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    dfrost1  2 months ago

    Assassins should be at the front.

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  36. Your fav dog
    deojaideep  2 months ago

    In India we have as follows: -Group 1: Covid Warriors (Doctors, Nurses, Police, Sanitation workers, etc.)Group 2: People over the age of 65 and people over the age of 45 having co-morbidities.Group 3: Others

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    Cary Rodda Premium Member 2 months ago

    Haha! Personally I think punsters should move up that list as they keep the rest of us entertained.

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    Querao (you can also call me quinn)  2 months ago

    Cartoonists should be next to long term.

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    Linguist  2 months ago

    It’s asinine to assume assassins get shot in the ass.

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  40. Hobo
    MeGoNow Premium Member 2 months ago

    But he’s still behind older assassins and assassins with vulnerable conditions.

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    Nyckname Premium Member 2 months ago

    Just be grateful that you’re not being sent to the punitentiary.

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    Tentoes  2 months ago

    I’m the least essential person in the state!

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    rshive  2 months ago

    At least Steph is ahead of somebody.

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    AndreasMartin  2 months ago

    Time to thin the herd a bit, there’s only so much space for pun-makers in this ecosystem…

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    DenO Premium Member 2 months ago
    Not in California.
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    Troglodyte  2 months ago

    Poor Stephan! Must be sad to know one’s expundable.

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    Steverino Premium Member 2 months ago

    I wonder if they have a vaccine against apundicidis?

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    Queen of America Premium Member 2 months ago

    I got my second shot 2 weeks ago today. I’d put Pastis in front of a lot of idiots.

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    jdsven  2 months ago

    Would it help if he mentioned he used to be a lawyer? Or will that get the same reaction that the Lost Boys gave in Hook?

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    raybarb44  2 months ago

    That surprises me too……

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    Hatter  2 months ago

    Ahead of illicit drug dealers too.

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    VickiP123  2 months ago

    the anti-vaxxers are having super spreader parties in TX & FL to find out if their faith is going to cure them

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    redback  2 months ago

    that was the punch line for Pastis

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    WCraft Premium Member 2 months ago

    Couldn’t we move pun-writers to a different list; perhaps those who are unknowingly injected with experimental vaccines with dangerous side-effects?

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    thelost wizard  2 months ago

    People who can make us laugh should be right near the top. Of course, that’s subjective, and could include anti-vaxxers and a lot of politicians.

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    phlash  2 months ago

    You’d be right there with Isaac Asimov (if Dirty Old Men wasn’t Group 784!)

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    swenbu Premium Member 2 months ago

    Good one, Steph….. and all good comments, too. I do agree with whoever said anyone who gives us a laugh should be considered essential!

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    Mr. Snuffles  2 months ago

    Couldn’t the assassins just kill everyone to get it sooner?

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  59. Nowyoulisten
    zeexenon  2 months ago

    Assassins should be insulted!

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    WimtenBrink2  2 months ago

    You need to profit from puns to be in that group… :P

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    ekke  2 months ago

    Assassins should come before those who profit from puns. Puns should always be free and plentiful!

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    Another Take  2 months ago

    …but only because punsters murder jokes and not people.

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    osimonich  2 months ago

    U belong n group 1 as a mental health worker. Luv your strip. Eagerly anticipate the end pun when i see the setup leading to it. Sure your degree wasn’t n psychology?

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    asrialfeeple  2 months ago

    Is he ahead of PUNdits?

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    Daeder  2 months ago

    But now assassins just want to assassinate all the people who profit from puns.

    OMG! We’ve all been assassins this whole time!?!

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    Cactus-Pete  2 months ago

    Yes, any time a choice is made it’s discriminatory.

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    oakie817  2 months ago

    but only by one

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    Sisyphos  2 months ago

    Most certainly, the Pun-isher Cartoon-Boy does not belong ahead of assassins!

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    BC in NC Premium Member 2 months ago

    Oh man, the GoComics commenters are even lower on the list then as we don’t even profit from them. :)

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    Swirls Before Pine  2 months ago

    No fair! Assassins serve a useful purpose.

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