Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 07, 2019


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    BE THIS GUY Premium Member over 1 year ago

    So much for taking personal responsibility.

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    alaskajohn1  over 1 year ago

    Welcome to the club, Pig.

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    kaffekup   over 1 year ago

    Those aren’t plans, anyway, Pig, they’re goals.

    Plans are how you get there.

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    Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member over 1 year ago

    The 7th could be “become bacon” .

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    TEMPLO S.U.D.  over 1 year ago

    Would be nice if I could do the first five; not too sure about retiring young though. (Additionally, how is Pig going to pay for his tuition in order to get himself a job? He’ll have student loans to work off until he’s old.)

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    Concretionist  over 1 year ago

    That “Perfect Spouse” item is going to ruin his plans anyway: “Perfect” is the enemy of ever getting past that step. “Perfectly good enough” will work better.

    PS: The world messes up everyone’s plans. The best plan is to have a single, theoretically achievable goal, and make sure that almost all of what you do takes you in that direction. Note: “Get a great job” is not a goal. The goal should be something like: Find work that pays well enough to afford (list of wanted things), doing something I enjoy (footnote to list of things you enjoy), with acceptable working conditions (footnote to another list)

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    Baarorso  over 1 year ago

    I’ve heard it said that…“If you want God to laugh, tell Him of your plans.” ;-D

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    PICTO  over 1 year ago

    “The best laid schemes o’ Mice an’ Men, / Gang aft agley,” -R.Burns

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    WMORAN1  over 1 year ago

    We make plans and God laughs!

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    Troglodyte  over 1 year ago

    Well, nobody ever told you it would do you a world of good, did they, Pig?

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    Breadboard  over 1 year ago

    Pig stop leaving the door open for the blue marble with legs to screw up ! … Croc Power !

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    Zebrastripes  over 1 year ago

    Life throws curves…just take the right one….

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    mjb515  over 1 year ago

    That you may have bad plans is not the world’s fault.

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    AJ2016  over 1 year ago

    All this time I thought it was MY poor life choices that were the root of my problems… Now I realize that it’s that little son-of-a-$%^&@ globe ruining everything!!!

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    Procat Premium Member over 1 year ago

    If someone who was not part of the 1%, suddenly became one of the 1%, would they complain?

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    The TM  over 1 year ago

    That wasn’t the world. It was a Trump-bot. Are more coming our way?

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    jpayne4040  over 1 year ago

    LOL! That was exactly my plan too when I was 17. It went just as well as Pig’s plan!

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    ekw555  over 1 year ago

    technically, those are not “plans”. those are “goals”.

    a “plan” would be how you plan to accomplish your goals.

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    Malcolm Hall  over 1 year ago

    Rat has a plan – crack open a beer!

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    Purple People Eater  over 1 year ago

    So, he’s been through plan A, plan B, plan c, etc, and now he’s up to plan F?

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    uniquename  over 1 year ago

    Thing is, if you have a great job, you may not want to retire.

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    scpandich  over 1 year ago

    I managed one of those six.

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    JudyAz  over 1 year ago

    He left off the last sign, the one everyone achieves eventually…


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    Reader  over 1 year ago

    These are global issues.

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    enigmamz  over 1 year ago

    So, Cape Horn is the world’s, um, front part, and the Cape of Good Hope, um, brings up the rear?

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    leomags  over 1 year ago

    The world??? Has absolutely nothing to do with success or failure. Having said that, I really don’t know what does……..

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    Snoots  over 1 year ago

    “And I have come to see the wise and the foolish, and the outcome is the same for both. For they both perish, and all that they have done is left to another, and who knows what he shall do, whether good or bad? And I have found that everything is a vanity and striving after wind.”

    And before that it just bites.

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    thelost wizard  over 1 year ago

    I think I came out 1 for 6 on his goals. No, I’m not going to say which one.

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    COL Crash  over 1 year ago

    Get used to it. Murphy and his Army of bugs really are the ones in control around here.

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    car2ner  over 1 year ago

    You can all pick on me later for being a Christian but I like to say, “I make my plans and God laughs and says..that’s nice dear. Here’s what we are really going to do”.

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    marilynnbyerly  over 1 year ago

    Your plans and God’s laughter.

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    WCraft Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Anyone else want to comment some variation of “…plans and God’s laughter?”

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    ChessPirate  over 1 year ago

    Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans…

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    EllisAmirRogersArcher  over 1 year ago

    What did Pig ever do to you?

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    mattro65  over 1 year ago

    How many different ways can Pastis make the same joke?

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    Old Guy  over 1 year ago

    Hmm, it’s amazing, because I hit almost all of them. I didn’t have a solid plan, I just did my best and trusted God for the rest. Now, two years after retiring, I feel truly blessed.

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    hariseldon59  over 1 year ago

    I’ve accomplished #s 1, 3, and to a modest extent 5. I’m a little old for 4 and 6. Still working on #2 though.

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    LeeYoung Premium Member over 1 year ago

    John Lennon: “Life is what happens while you’re making other plans”.

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    Kali  over 1 year ago

    Doesn’t Pig already HAVE a spouse? She’d kill him for that….

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    gnome  over 1 year ago

    …idk…world looks hot about something….

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    librarian4hire  over 1 year ago

    You and me both, Pig. You and me both.

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    HisTyness  over 1 year ago

    “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans” -John Lennon

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    Procat Premium Member over 1 year ago

    If someone who wasn’t part of the 1% suddenly became part of the 1%, would there attitude about the 1% change?

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    Mike H  over 1 year ago

    You have to settle for plan C usually.

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    Sisyphos  over 1 year ago

    That is the Way of the World, Pig. Sorry about that.

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    comicsrrd  over 1 year ago

    At 19, I was like Pig in panel 1. Only I thought bigger! So the universe messed up my plans…. :D

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