Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 05, 2019

Pig, I hope you gave her a big bird.

One would have been enough.

love it.

I was thinking Oscar Mayer.

women have no sense of humor

I would’ve made one of the two Oscars a Wiener sausage (maybe its promotional whistle).

THAT was a good one.

Pig, at least you have your two Oscars. Play with them.

I was thinking piranhas…

“Darling , come to my place and I’ll show you my Oscar collection”

I began to introduce her to one of my Oscars – Oscar Madison, and we both were fond of our other Oscar. She then said something that we were full of bologna … I asked if she knew my other friend …

My Bologna has a first name, / It’s O-S-C-A-R. / My bologna has a second name, / It’s M-A-Y-E-R. / Oh I love to eat it everyday, / And if you ask me why say, / Cause’ Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A!!!!

She left screaming that we were Oscar Wild

Ha!

At last, some humour!

Is that tie attached to Pig’s snout?

Funny comments!

Could have been worse. He could have said he had two Tonys and then showed her the cutouts he made from Frosted Flakes boxes.

Pig I guess Anna does not like honesty in a relationship :-( …… Croc Power !

What a Grouch!

Anna should have responded w/ a Señora Wensez Schtick!

Pig is a massive nobber.

Luckily she didn’t get Wilde at Pig!

Women are willing to date a pig when they think he is a celebrity.

She didn’t hang around long enough to see his Beanie Baby collection?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXILNncQwH4

Doesn’t anyone feel sorry for Pigitta?

COOKIES!

I was envisioning some weird, cannibalistic, Oscar Mayer joke.

I once had occasion to meet the little person (I am also a little person) who played “Little Oscar” for various Oscar Meyer promotions many years ago. He was also the coroner who declared the Wicked Witch of the East dead in “The Wizard of Oz.” His name was Meinhardt Raabe. Very nice man.

Shee! What a grouch!

She prefers Bert and Ernie to 2 Oscars.

Pig, when Anna said she had to leave early you should have shown her your Big Bird. Left or right hand.

Contemplating a perverse form of bestiality with a human, Pig? Pigita will object.

She didn’t want to stick around to see his Emmy’s or Tony’s?

Pig dates humans?

LOL!

Funny thing is for seven years (age 3 to age 10) I thought that’s what the Oscar awards were all about. I thought they were a parody of the Academy Awards, I didn’t realize that they WERE the Academy Awards.

So many times I wish I could protect Pig from the harsh, cruel world.

She took Oscar’s advice and decided to scram!

I wish I would’ve, too, before reading this one today…

Pig has un-merged with the couch, it seems.

Pig won them fair and square – on ebay!

Can’t blame her. He should have gotten two Counts.

—In which Pig learns that honesty is not the best policy when dating….

ka-tie

You got ripped off, Pig. You could’ve gotten those for free from a trash can.

wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i dont get it