Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 30, 2018


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    BE THIS GUY Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Goat should have said it isn’t over until the plus size lady sings.

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    whataboytjiex2  over 1 year ago

    Pig, in your case I do believe the fat lady has sung!

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    Robin Harwood  over 1 year ago

    Why is it wrong to say that fat people are fat, and should be ashamed of it?

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    TEMPLO S.U.D.  over 1 year ago

    The word police must be doing a wonderful job when it comes to figures of speech.

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    Strawberry Hellcat: Gair I gall, ffon I’r anghall Premium Member over 1 year ago

    How did the prosecutor miss the use of ain’t in the charges against goat? Many moons ago, English teachers raked students over the coals for using ain’t instead of isn’t!

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    Jesy Bertz  over 1 year ago

    According to the seal on the Judge’s bench, Goat was tried in the “Court of Public Opinion”. He should have demanded a change of venue. The “Court of Sports Cliches” would have been more appropriate and sympathetic to his case.

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    blunebottle  over 1 year ago

    I forget- who was the fat lady, by the way?

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    Johnny Q Premium Member over 1 year ago

    The Word Police are a pretty easy satirical target…

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Sure we have them. And we always will. They have their place. Just like Thought Police (along the lines of “You were thinking about having another drink.”) and Grammar Police. It hurts nothing. Discourse continues as it sees fit.

    Now, if you ask me “Do you always practice what you preach?” The answer is “Hell no.” I have called out a Grammar Cop or two.

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    x_Tech  over 1 year ago

    They may be losing but are they down for real?

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    DonPoole  over 1 year ago

    I think “ain’t” is still “out.” Unfortunately “snuck” is still hanging around to turn my stomach.

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    SquawkTron  over 1 year ago

    The word police must make easy money doing their job.

    Count me in!

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    socalvillaguy Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Stephan, you only need to worry about the cliché police…

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    mr_sherman Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Pastis is into punography.

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    EcurbYkspohs  over 1 year ago

    Someday the only things you may say to each other will be “Hello” and “Goodbye”…….

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    JackButler1  over 1 year ago

    Double-plus ungood bellyfeel. Stet rerite 10/2.

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    Brass Orchid Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Making the world a better place, one authoritarian executive over-reach at a time.

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    Jimmy90403  over 1 year ago

    Yogi also reminded us that when you come to a fork in the road, take it.

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    Cameron1988 Premium Member over 1 year ago

    That’s beyond ridiculous

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    F-Flash  over 1 year ago

    Mama Cass ?

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    old crony Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Humor approved by the word police ain’t funny no more.

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    tom.amitai  over 1 year ago

    So disappointed to see you perpetuating this tired right-wing trope.

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    Masterskrain Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Pastis is to “Political Correctness” as Mel Brooks is to Hitler. I.E. Make it such a target of ridicule and humor that NO ONE can take it seriously, and want to follow it ever again.

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    ralphkramden  over 1 year ago

    This would be funny if it wasn’t true……

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    fjames01  over 1 year ago

    I love the court insignia. Should add “Court of Social Media” too. (Yes, it may be a tad redundant)

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    dave stoops  over 1 year ago

    sheila jackson lee

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    diverleo  over 1 year ago

    Well done Mr. Pastis.

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    johnmartin1671  over 1 year ago

    The problem is that in this PC world we live in, “It ain’t over ‘til the plus-sized individual, currently identifying as a female, sings” just doesn’t roll off the tongu.

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    rjgray9  over 1 year ago

    All is well that Orwells

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    thelost wizard  over 1 year ago

    The prosecution seems to be off base (no pun intended). I think the reference is to a Wagnerian opera and I don’t believe he was Italian.

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    Ermine Notyours  over 1 year ago

    It’s especially harsh to try Goat in prison clothes in front of a jury.

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    YouBetchaAy  over 1 year ago

    Honestly, this is how society is in 2018.

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    dr_suess  over 1 year ago

    That loud noise at the end Triggered me! Back to comic jail for you, bub! ;-)

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    wingalls  over 1 year ago

    He’s lucky the Grammar Police didn’t catch him first. Using “ain’t” is a hanging offense.

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    wellis1947 Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Actually, I was always under the assumption that the “fat lady” reference was made about Kate Smith, who usually closed her performances with a rousing rendition of “God Bless America”.

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    khcm1157  over 1 year ago

    The Word Police forgot to correct the bad grammar, not likely.

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    Asharah  over 1 year ago

    How about, “It ain’t over until the lead diva sings.”

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    tripwire45  over 1 year ago

    Absolutely spot on. Well done, Stephen.

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    B UTTONS  over 1 year ago

    Pig’s “Down” – discrimination against

    people with depression;people with down’s syndromegeese and / or ducks

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    gorbasche2  over 1 year ago

    Reminds me of an old TV show, “The Practice” in the late nineties (turned into “Boston Legal” later on). Lawyers had to represent a hugely fat chick who went to a carnival and a dunk-tank-clown called her fat while trying to draw in contestants. Waahhhhh…..

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    Leojim  over 1 year ago

    I wish there wasn’t so much truth in this comic.

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    gbars70  over 1 year ago

    I find it interesting that most comedians, comic artists and humorists in general are usually unfailingly liberal except when it comes to their own comedic freedom of expression; I.e. Bill Maher, Jerry Seinfeld etc.; then it becomes an outrage about outrage.

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    RandyPrice  over 1 year ago

    Punctuation Police!: the apostrophe before “Til” is upside down.

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    marilynnbyerly  over 1 year ago

    This was a job for the cliche police, NOT the word police. Sheesh.

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    krunchykitty  over 1 year ago

    Punctuation police disapproves: the apostrophe in ’til is facing the wrong way.

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    JoeMartinFan Premium Member over 1 year ago

    I get what Pastis is trying to say, but I’m just not buying the notion that today’s PC climate is SOOO oppressive. Yes, it CAN go too far from time to time, but you might wanna talk to some veterans of the ’60s Civil Rights movement, or perhaps survivors of the Marxist-Communist era in Eastern Europe, to discover what REAL oppression looks like.

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    DCBakerEsq  over 1 year ago


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    eladee  over 1 year ago

    ….and once again the Word Police have sucked all the joy and humor out of everything!!!

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    BeniHanna6 Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Love it, thanks for the belly laugh, Mr. Pastis.

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    Sailor46 USN 65-95  over 1 year ago

    That offends you? It’s funny to me. That must be why I’m happier than you.

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    gbars70  over 1 year ago

    I find it interesting that most comedians, comic artists and humorists in general are usually unfailingly liberal except when it comes to their own comedic freedom of expression; I.e. Bill Maher, Jerry Seinfeld etc.; then it becomes an outrage about outrage.

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    mail2jbl  over 1 year ago

    Well done, Cartoon Boy – well done.

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    Brain Pudding Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Um, Patsis you have offended me with your Anti-lunacy rant against my right to silence you through intimidation, boycott, yelling loudly in your face, flash mobbing, getting you fired, or using the tools of government to destroy you.

    I will be organizing a social justice crusade to end your so called “comic” for your attack on me and my black masked, trash can throwing mob. This is no longer say we all (well, 50% +1 of us)!!!

    I am really offended…THAT is the standard to which you MUST submit …you will face the consequences!

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    WCraft Premium Member over 1 year ago

    Approved by the SJW – after they settled down.

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    floperson  over 1 year ago

    So, Stephen Pastis, you’re making fun of the word police. You’re making fun of people trying to teach us not to be so freaking insensitive? Sigh. Oops, your white privilege is showing, careful, right there. Come on, aren’t you better than this?

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    tonicee9  over 1 year ago

    Long way to go for not funny.

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    phlash  over 1 year ago

    First time I ever heard it was an episode of Dukes of Hazzard and it was “Church ain’t over ’til the fat lady sings”

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    Sisyphos  over 1 year ago

    You probably think it’s funny, now. But wait until the Word Police come for you!

    Poor Goat. Is he allowed to have visitors in Re-Education Camp?

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    cats_in_bowties  over 1 year ago

    Oh hey, look, another gross misrepresentation at how things actually work. eyeroll

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    aull41  over 1 year ago

    He missed “Improper English” — 10 yards penalty

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    SFpagan  over 1 year ago

    I notice nobody has pointed out to the media that their use of “witchhunt” is offensive or that Hollywood is still making bucks/movies potraying witches/pagans as evil ……..

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    Scott Sallstrom  over 1 year ago

    “It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.” – Yogi Berra

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    su43dipta  over 1 year ago

    Now the international clowns and funny people organization is out to get you for publishing writing an unfunny comic!

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    ekw555  over 1 year ago

    I guess the PC word police beat the grammar Nazis to the scene of the crime(s).

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    OldDadTheBoss  over 1 year ago

    Pretty sure it was Ethel Merman.

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    ADNERB Premium Member over 1 year ago

    The Word Police takes the fun out of everything!!!

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    spikelovesmusic  over 1 year ago

    In the late 1970’s, it was a motto of the Washington (then-) Bullets basketball team, who stayed in the games to pull out their one championship season in ‘78. Heck, I used to have a T-shirt!However, the roots of the expression seem to go back even further!This discussion ain’t over ’til…

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    ebrooks  over 1 year ago

    Do women WANT to be called commoners?

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