Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 24, 2017

Chapter 2 should be:

Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of the party.

The five boxing wizards jump quickly. Pack my box with five dozen liquor jugs. This stuff practically writes itself.

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

Where’s my ax?

He forgot the “Sir!” at the end.

red rum

Then Count Weirdly’s minions vanquish Slylock Fox and rescue the dog.

It’s a good start, but I’d like to see a bit more character development. Why do we care that the dog is lazy or the brown fox quick?

No, the quick RED fox jumped over the lazy BROWN dog! Get it right, Pastis…er…“Pete”!

So what does the fox say?

Typing was the only thing I learned in high school that has been of any use to me over the years.

The phrase was taught in typing because it includes every letter of the alphabet. It was a way to check every letter of your typewriter to make sure it was functioning. With computers, I guess we don’t really need that, but it’s still neat.

I once built a Quick Brown Fox generator for testing a computer screen controller

Follow it up with, “And then the murders began.” You’ll have a bestseller.

It was a dark and stormy night when a shot rang out.

The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog’s back.

It has to be jumped, not jumps, otherwise there’s no d in the sentence.

Wonder how many Linkster generation children know what that is all about? Of course they can google it.

(I have!!) He was a dark and stormy knight…..

Better then Rat’s epic; “The sea was filled with angry monkeys!”

“The lazy dog opened one eye and stood up. He chased after the quick brown fox but the fox was too fast”

Hence the word “Quick”

xxx

Clearly, professor Pete has been typecast.

The meme is extreme, but devoid of a theme, it would seem..

Every computer geek is on the edge of their seats …

I see. Okay, ex-Prof. Pete. Don’t call us; we’ll call you. (Ha! Like, never!)

[signed] The Editor

As a former member of typing class, this cracked me up!

Suddenly a pirate ship appeared on the horizon.

Our high school typing teacher married one of my classmates (he was about 29) after we graduated (so she would be adult age) in 1975.

We didn’t have Typing when I was in school, we had Keyboarding. Even in seventh grade I found it funny that they thought calling Typing Keyboarding because it was being done on a computer made it different. I mean most if not all of us had seen a typewriter at home and probably a quarter to a third of us already had a computer in our houses; it was the time when typewriters were slowly vanishing and they were putting out those hybrid typewriter-computers called word processors as replacements for typewriters in Sears and big name electronics stores. All of us knew what a computer keyboard was and that it had the same layout as a typewriter and we all knew from the very first class what Keyboarding really was. Made no sense to call it Keyboarding instead of Typing since the only thing that had changed was what was used to teach on.

Professor Pete is the next Aesop!

I also learned typing in high school. Unfortunately, I now have to forget everything I learned because I now have to type with my thumbs.