Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 31, 2016

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    BE THIS GUY  over 5 years ago

    The poetry of a ribeye is more impressive than what you’re writing.

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  2. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  over 5 years ago

    And now the posters who keep saying “More crocs” will start saying “More cows.”

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    Bilan  over 5 years ago

    I think that I shall never chewa grass as lovely with morning dew.

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    gatocatcat  over 5 years ago

    Chick-Fil-A files copyright infringement lawsuit against plagiarizing comic artist.

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    Wilde Bill  over 5 years ago

    Every verse will end with “Eat more Chicken”.

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    blunebottle  over 5 years ago

    Her poetry mooooooooves me.

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    Tokenization  over 5 years ago

    Idk if that’s gonna help ..uhmmm…Mr.cow…Better if you just hide. ;|

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    Tokenization  over 5 years ago

    Literally :|

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    Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 5 years ago

    A star is born.

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    Trilobyte Premium Member over 5 years ago

    Udderly amazing puns to follow…

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    wolfowned  over 5 years ago

    Jersey verse-y.

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    Kind&Kinder  over 5 years ago

    More cowbell, please.

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    biz.gocomics  over 5 years ago

    Maybe the cow would do better at haiku…

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    juicebruce  over 5 years ago

    More cowbell, please…………… to keep the skit going…..

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    tripwire45  over 5 years ago

    I had a flank steak last night. It was delicious.

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    llhack  over 5 years ago

    Not good enough-I’ll have mine medium rare!

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    Chad Cheetah  over 5 years ago

    If there was a cow next to them, why didn’t Rat say anything?

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    dmostroff  over 5 years ago

    It is so stupid, it is really funny.

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    Red Centipede  over 5 years ago

    If cows wrote political speeches or jokes for Colbert we might not eat them, but nobody reads poetry. Bad luck for cows.

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    Andrew Sleeth Premium Member over 5 years ago

    … asks a talking zebra of a rat, who spends many days at a computer composing fiction stories.

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    whiteheron  over 5 years ago

    Pastis will milk this for all it’s worth.

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    livermoron  over 5 years ago

    DISTANT HILLSby A Far Side Cow

    The distant hills call to me.Their rolling waves seduce my heart.Oh, how I want to graze in their lush valleys.Oh, how I want to run down their green slopes.Alas, I cannot.Damn the electric fence!Damn the electric fence!

    CREDIT: Far Side cartoon by Gary Larson, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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    uniquename  over 5 years ago

    Wait until he meets 2 Cows and a Chicken

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    shakeswilly  over 5 years ago

    Holy cows are found only in the lines of poetry. Others can be shot or eaten or turned into a jacket.

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    Carl Rennhack Premium Member over 5 years ago

    This poetic cow could be another Roberta Frostbite…or Carla Sandbag!

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    James Wolfenstein  over 5 years ago

    Why would you spare a cow because it can write poetry??Maybe, and it’s a huge maybe, if it can write a decent novel. Poetry is crap. In fact, who needs poets???

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    rshive  over 5 years ago

    Shakespeare it’s not.

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    omegasupreme  over 5 years ago

    to moo or not to moo that is the udder question…

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    SR  over 5 years ago

    Not good enough. I’ve herd all these puns before.

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    JPuzzleWhiz  over 5 years ago

    “Eat Mor Chikin”

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    Ermine Notyours  over 5 years ago

    Worked for Charlotte’s Web, though it was the spider who was being creative.

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    David Rickard Premium Member over 5 years ago

    I wonder if Vogans started the same way…

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    A. Weiner  over 5 years ago

    Steph is a real cowpoke.

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    @Rad-ish  Premium Member over 5 years ago

    I’ve never seen a purple cowI’ve never tried to eat one…

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    BiathlonNut  over 5 years ago

    Question for the day: What is the singular of the word, “cattle?” Hint: It is not “cow” which can refer to a number of herd animals such as moose (meese?), elephants, etc.

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    zeexenon  over 5 years ago

    Shhh, baby tuckoo may be reading.

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    BiathlonNut  over 5 years ago

    Was it Robert A. Heinlein who said, " Poets who read their own work in public should be staked out on an anthill?"

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    foxsinger Premium Member over 5 years ago

    Utter poetry!

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    Vonne Anton  over 5 years ago

    Agree that this is deliriously funny, made me choke on my tea. Now, to add to the cow jokes, see below:*KNOCK KNOCKWho’s there?THE INTERRUPTING COWThe Interru —MOOOOO

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    mike92127  over 5 years ago

    Eat more Chikn!

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    angelfiredragon  over 5 years ago

    Growing up on a farm and having my pet cow, goat and others slaughtered (don’t ever befriend food it just doesn’t go well and made me a vegetarian for a while) I can assure you they were never shot…their throats were slit to end it as quickly as possible. Shooting costs bullets and can take far longer than slitting the neck. No one wanted the animals to suffer so the fastest it could be over with the better.

    I never did it myself, I was too young but I’d go to school and come home to feed my pets and they were missing and I wandered into the building and found my pet goat hanging upside down without skin or a head…boy did I cry.

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    Hokie1979 Premium Member over 5 years ago

    Hey, maybe we do like the BBQ places do with pigs…the cows who can write poetry get to live and serve as the signboard mascots for the restaurants that are serving their non-literary brethren inside!

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    Number Three  over 5 years ago

    Why doesn’t Zebra appear much any more?xxx

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    Skylark  over 5 years ago

    Cows won’t be talkinganytime soon.May I suggest theyjump over the moon

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    danketaz Premium Member over 5 years ago

    Sledgehammer to the forehead pops to mind.

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    Sisyphos  over 5 years ago

    What Cow has written hardly qualifies as poetry. Heck, it barely counts as versification. Bring on the beefsteaks!

    (Furtive glance to see if Happy Happy Happy! is around)The cook at the place where I oft spent summers kept rabbits in cages in a space just outside the house. If on coming in after a day’s work I’d see the cage(s) empty, I’d know we were having some version of bunny bits for dinner that evening. And, yes, it does taste like chicken; even looks like chicken, at least in certain parts….

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    PurpleVegan  over 5 years ago

    Go vegan. Whatever color of vegan you want to be, be it!

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    Paul Go Premium Member over 5 years ago

    now I’m all hungry

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    Jeff0811  over 5 years ago

    A cow haiku:

    A cow without hornsIs in the female subsetWould I steer you wrong?

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    asianwoof  over 5 years ago

    Let me digest that for a moment.

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    Kaputnik  over 5 years ago

    The cows may wish,That we’d eat fish.Sorry Chief,We like our beef.

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    HowieL  over 5 years ago

    Does no one remember Cows With Guns?

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    billdaviswords  over 5 years ago

    That’s “chikn.”

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    grampianlothian  over 5 years ago

    The last line doesnt scan. Moo moo moo would be better.

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  55. Thanos
    Thanos  about 3 years ago

    Hey Chick-Fil-A called, and they want their cow mascot back Steven. :\

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    RaZaP  almost 2 years ago

    The first Pearls strip I ever read. :D

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