Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 28, 2016
Rat: Where's Pig? Stephen: I hired him as an assistant. So today he's writing 'STP' on all my socks and underwear. Rat: What's 'STP'? Stephen: My initials, Stephan Thomas Pastis. Pig: Okay, Steph. All done. Stephen: I said 'STP', not 'STD'. Pig: I don't hear that well. Rat: Oh, you will so charm the ladies.