Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 13, 2015

  1. Right here
    Sherlock Watson  about 9 years ago

    I’m guessing Thomas’s favorite song is “Short People” by Randy Newman.

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    Bilan  about 9 years ago

    Then what’s Rat’s reason?

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    blunebottle  about 9 years ago

    Wow- Rat gets it in this one.

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    Alexander the Good Enough  about 9 years ago

    I have a fearless young woman friend who is 6’ 5", doesn’t mind it a bit, and works it. When someone asks her how tall she is, she charges them a buck for the answer, then plays the lottery with the money. What’s more, she tells me that when she grows up, she’s going to be a dominatrix. Hates basketball, BTW.

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    wiselad  about 9 years ago

    lot of average joes can do what Thomas did to Rat

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    alviebird  about 9 years ago

    I was only 6’-2", but I hit it at a very early age. (Was, because I’ve since shrunk.) I did not like all the pressure to play basketball. I didn’t like the game then, and think less of it now.

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    GuntherGrass  about 9 years ago

    I thought that everybody loves basketball, except for me. My friends look askance at me when I don’t share their joy about the Kings and their new arena

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    Woody157  about 9 years ago

    “How is the weather up there, Thomas? I bet the air is kinda thin at that altitude. "

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    TMO1 Premium Member about 9 years ago

    Rat had it coming, but not for this. Karma?

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    phylum  about 9 years ago

    I notice that Thomas missed rats head by about one neck and torso..however that may not have been a miss…

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  11. Hellcat
    knight1192a  about 9 years ago

    He only kneed him in the head cause the oompla-loompas were too low to knee and he didn’t want to dirty his shoes kicking him there.

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    PICTO  about 9 years ago

    He could have at least slam dunked Rat into the coffee cup.

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    cdward  about 9 years ago

    I’m playing my tiny violin for the tall guy. Poor baby gets asked how tall he is and if he plays basketball. Geez. Try being short and dealing with the garbage people give you. Including a song that starts, “short people got no reason to live…”

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  14. Thinker
    Sisyphos  about 9 years ago

    Ooooh! Love to see Rat taking it on the chin! He’s been having a real streak of payback for all his wicked ways! Hope he enjoys it….

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    shade8211  about 9 years ago

    6’8’ and I agree with Thomas first 2 questions every time.

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    rdf5890 Premium Member about 9 years ago

    A tall friend of mine once said that when asked “How’s the weather up there?” he would spit on their head and say “Its raining.”

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    Carl Rennhack Premium Member about 9 years ago

    Long time ago I had a classmate who was 6’ 10". When asked the basketball kweschun, he replied, “No. Do you play MINATURE golf?”

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    grassler  about 9 years ago

    All I ever say is that I walk into open cabinet doors a lot

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    nmcconnell  about 9 years ago

    I have a friend that is close to 7-foot tall. Recently he was wearing a t-shirt that said “Hard to kidnap”

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    Cameron1988 Premium Member about 9 years ago

    Right in the groan! Nice one, Thomas! Rat, so deserves it

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    puddlesplatt  about 9 years ago

    was never allowed to play sports…hence I hate them!

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    Reppr Premium Member about 9 years ago

    Short tempers? yes, I guess we do. Ever notice how short people ask you to get things off the top shelf for them but they get offended if you ask them to get something off the bottom shelf?

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    jersey stevens  about 9 years ago

    I’m six foot six, and I dont get asked that 20x a day. I walk in and people just stare. fine. get out of my way and dont piss me off

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    amaryllis2 Premium Member about 9 years ago

    6’6" isn’t tall around here. Back in school my husband got spotted by a basketball coach, who started harassing him and saying You’re going to be on my team or I’m going to kick you between the teeth. His response was, I don’t think you can get your foot that high as he walked away.

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    abbybookcase  about 9 years ago

    i’m “vertically impaired”. one of the few times i liked garfield. jon asks how’s the weather down there? garfield claws his knees to shreds. then says flatly—drafty.we all have our crosses to bear. frankly the world gives way more to the tall than the short.

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    Number Three  about 9 years ago

    I am 20 and 5’2. I would love to be at least 5’6.But never mind. It’s not really a big deal for

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    Godfreydaniel  about 9 years ago

    Isn’t it out of character for Goat to have a violent friend? (Isn’t it out of character for Goat to have ANY kind of a friend?)

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    sevenfeet0  about 9 years ago

    Do we hear the first two questions every day? Yes. But I long got used to it. Sometimes you meet nice people that way.

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    penny1017  about 9 years ago

    Hitting a little close to home there Steph!

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    claire de la lune.  about 9 years ago

    Tall Thomas.Huehue.

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    beammeup1701 (Bozo by Foxo makes everyone happy!)  about 9 years ago

    I’m 6’ 3" and have been tall since my early teens. Way back when, I developed what I thought was the perfect answer when short people asked me “what’s the weather like up there?” I just look down at them, grin real big, and say, “You’ll never know…”

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    Digital Frog  about 9 years ago

    I like the response to the basketball question: “Do you play miniature golf?”

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    Goblinopolis  about 9 years ago

    I’m only 6’3" and I got that question frequently as a young man. Of course that was before NBA players started exceeding the 7’ mark on a regular basis.

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    Die Barney  over 3 years ago

    Hey! I’m a tall person!

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    alantain  12 months ago

    Short people have shorter tempers. Especially when you hate getting elbowed in the head by an unobservant tall person.

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