March 08, 2019
February 03, 2019
you’re so going to blow the case, Snoopy
When you talk to the head of the school board, don’t forget to tell them the story of The Great Pumpkin.
Are these quotes coming from a book of legal quotations or a TV show or something?
Wonder why Snoopy prefers harder mysteries
Looks like Linus is doing all the legwork for this case…
For all the help he’s been, I hope Snoopy is doing this case pro bone-o.
I think they might have a case.
THE GREAT PUMPKIN IN TWO DAYS!!
Snoopy’s competence in the law is just as impressive as Lucy’s psychiatric accomplishments.
Allegedly actual courtroom statements:
Q: “The truth of the matter is that you were not an unbiased, objective witness, isn’t it? You too were shot in the fracas.”
A: “No, sir. I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval.”
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you’ve forgotten?
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
Q: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
Q: Did you check for breathing?
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk, in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, never the less?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
Snoopy, I thought All those Joes and Reos make sense in battle field turf.