Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for September 18, 2021

Siri, let me introduce you to a special friend, the hammer

I wonder if he hurt his foot.

When my grandma croaks, you can have her hands. She’s not strong enough to strangle people or hold a gun steady.

“Ok google” to the rescue?!?

But do NOT get us the “rack” upgrade. We’re this close to filing for a restraining order for excessive fondling as it is.

Looks like Skynet isn’t far away.

I wonder if the digital apocalypse will be followed by the zombie apocalypse.

While you’re out on your walk, bury that thing. Life will be simpler. You have kids; why do you need someone else telling you what to do?

If you need to communicate with a robot to get answers to your questions, eventually YOUR brain will slow down from lack of use. Fact! Use your brain to find the answers to your questions, READ!

Time to retire Alexa to the outdoor storage receptacle so kindly provided by the local sanitation dept.

Then they can run off together and get away from these losers.

I was listening to the radio and they played a commercial for how you could listen to their station on a Google app. Then the announcer said," Hey Google, play W*** radio," and my phone started playing their station…

Why would either Siri or Alexa want to appear as human? Much better to be, say, a fighter jet or even a congress critter.

Once we actually have machines that can improve their own programming and reproduce themselves, everything changes. And it may not be far away.

I wasn’t worried until I saw “Kung Fu” in my Google search. I haven’t looked up kung fu in decades.

PLEASE. . .my computer can’t even tell where I want a document filed unless I tell it. . .and even then, it doesn’t always make it there. . .

I wrote my first computer program in 1966. With credits like that, you would think I am an uber-geek who is on the bleeding edge of technology acceptance.

Actually, I’m in the main body. I’ll give it a year or two to work the bugs out AND become a lot cheaper; then I’ll get on board.

However, even at that, there is only so much technology I will accept. I do not need a smart house. I’ve gotten used to turning on my own lights and I really do not want to give hackers a listening device in my own home.

BTW: Today Microsoft releases Windows 11, the operating system that comes after its last-ever O/S, Windows 10. Don’t worry, you have years before they will force you to upgrade. By that time, even I will probably moved onto a new computer.

“iPhone 13 Pro Max starts at $1,099”. I am loving my Android phone more each day.

The only time I interface with Siri is to turn it off when i accidentally hit the button on my Mac.

My granddaughter’s name is Siri (she was born before the machine took off) and she’s been complaining that she wants to switch to her middle name. Harder to spell but at least no more ragging by her friends.

If artificial intelligence does come about, why would these machines want to wipe out humanity. Presumably they would be smarter than us and would see the futility of war and lose of life on both sides. There is no reason we could not live in peace together.

I use technology.

But this Siri/Alexa crap, makes me wanta go Full Luddite.

“The UPGRADE” now available for a small, but not insignificant, fee —monthly.

This could be Sirious.

The big boob upgrade will make her feel even more complete

My “digital assistant” just told me it couldn’t make a phone call. a) it’s not a phone device and b) I didn’t say a word to it.

Siri is telling him just what he wants to hear.

These devices are missing the moral code (programmer joke)

He should ask Google Assistant’s opinion about this.

And thus the origin story of webcomic Questionable Content

Well, disconnect her (?) from the Internet and reboot to factory specs. But if you hear, “What are you doing, Dave?” be REALLY quick about it.

TBBT fans, there are now follow up entries to yesterday’s thread.

My husband’s Alexa has been silent lately. I unplugged it.

Hmmm. Could Siri and Alexa be dating?

Never trust anyone who has to say, “Trust me.”

Why couldn’t Alexa just order the arms and legs herself and have the Geek Squad install them?

The stereotyped feminine personalities are getting tiresome.

I can only wish I could give Alexa a robot body, especially if it was strong enough and fast enough to follow me around and be a nurse and personal assistant.

My Magic 8 Ball is entirely sufficient for me. No upgrades or maintenance fees required. It isn’t snoopy, either.

Methinks you protestest too much!

Delete delete delete!