Advertisement

Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for December 12, 2020

282 Comments

Hide All Comments
  1. Missing large
    eastern.woods.metal  4 months ago

    Two bits says she’s also over her account balance and has to scan half of it back

     •  Reply
  2. 16149249463701563426940860107488
    jasonsnakelover  4 months ago

    Gocery grambling

     •  Reply
  3. Missing large
    Martin I  4 months ago

    And she’s sure to have a fistful of expired coupons.

     •  Reply
  4. Missing large
    GreasyOldTam  4 months ago

    It’s easy for me to choose. I always get the slowest line. Don’t line up behind me.

     •  Reply
  5. 654px red eyed tree frog   litoria chloris edit1
    Superfrog  4 months ago

    The house always wins.

     •  Reply
  6. Brain guy dancing hg clr
    Concretionist  4 months ago

    (sigh). There’s a concept called “speed queue” and they use it in banks these days, mostly: One queue of people waiting for the very next teller.  Why they don’t do it in grocery stores is because they don’t WANT to. They want us to wait around next to the impulse-buy items in front of the checkout station.

     •  Reply
  7. Samvadi fb
    in.amongst  4 months ago

    Not sure i would bet my cart on any one of them.

     •  Reply
  8. 8863814b f9b6 46ec 9f21 294d3e529c09
    mattro65  4 months ago

    What’s a checkbook?

     •  Reply
  9. Bead braid p
    I Mad Am I  4 months ago

    In my favorite store… there is the Self Check-out. The line for Self is very long! It goes from the middle of the store… through the Seasonal items and is close to being in the Produce! The other lanes are every other… for Social Distancing reasons. But most are the lower numbers. And those lines are fairly long. I live in a very superstitious zone. The line for Check-out Lane #13 is usually short. 13 Is my favorite number for weird reasons. I always aim for it in the store. And even though I am slow moving… I am usually out of there before all the others I was dancing around in the isles of sundry items.

     •  Reply
  10. Sammy on gocomics
    Say What Now‽ Premium Member 4 months ago

    I once got behind what I thought was the shortest line. The store, I’ll call it Malwart, was pushing their credit cards. The cashier has to ask each customer if they want to apply, so the one person ahead of mechosed to apply. He had to fill out all the information while I watched all the other lines moving much faster. When it was my turn, I mentioned to the cashier that they should set aside those customers aside. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one who complained. They now just have people walk through the store to push their credit cards.

     •  Reply
  11. 45732a
    Sanspareil  4 months ago

    The worst line is the one where the checkout person and the customer have an incredibly slow paced conversion about trivial BS while the next customers are seething!

     •  Reply
  12. Missing large
    dshans  4 months ago

    At least Wiley used the correct “fewer” rather than the commonly used ungrammatical “less.”

     •  Reply
  13. Get smart shoe phone
    gopher gofer  4 months ago

    my wife got in line today behind yet another clueless granny who waited until her turn at the register to start searching for her loyalty card (of course). after waiting patiently for a couple minutes the exasperated cashier finally told granny to just hold her purse up close to the scanner. granny was surprised to hear the scanner beep and then immediately resumed looking for her card…

     •  Reply
  14. Missing large
    Turnhandle  4 months ago

    LOL! This used to be one of my biggest pet peeves! It was always an older lady who would wait until all of the groceries were rung up, and THEN start searching through her purse for her checkbook. And then slowly write out the date, the store name . . . and I would be seething. I would go to the store with my check all filled out except for the amount. Of course no one writes checks for groceries anymore – or at least I haven’t seen anyone do it for years.

     •  Reply
  15. Smokeystover  2
    gbars70  4 months ago

    Now where’s that pen?

     •  Reply
  16. Camera1 016
    keenanthelibrarian  4 months ago

    FINALLY someone has a sign saying “12 ITEMS OR FEWER” NOT “12 Items or LESS”. It is not hard to understand the difference!!

     •  Reply
  17. Hitmouse text
    hitmouse  4 months ago

    At least the sign says “or fewer” and not “or less”!

     •  Reply
  18. Mr haney
    NeedaChuckle Premium Member 4 months ago

    A corollary to this is the person in line for minutes at a fast food joint. They stand there for a fairly long time and don’t look at the menu till they get to the counter then can’t decide what they want!!

     •  Reply
  19. I am the night
    sappha58  4 months ago

    In the last eight years, I’ve only seen one person at the grocery writing a check.

     •  Reply
  20. Picture4
    #Rad-ish  Premium Member 4 months ago

    May I use your pen? What is the date? I need to write I note that I spent the money first…

     •  Reply
  21. Lamb2
    WCLamb  4 months ago

    I like it when somebody with a cart-full of items hits the express lane (12 items or less) and the cashier asks them “which of those 12 items in your cart did you want to buy?”

     •  Reply
  22. Missing large
    1953Baby  4 months ago

    THANK GAWD FOR SHOPPERS!!! The one luxury I permit myself.

     •  Reply
  23. Sherlock holmes gillette chose the pipe and deerstalker because they could be seen easily in the theater
    WGillete  4 months ago

    Last time I was in a grocery store I was behind two men with a carriage bulging with groceries for a party. As the cashier rang it up, one guy bagged, refilling the cart. Then, when it was time to pay… the card’s no good, don’t have the cash, make a call got help, they walk away. Then we wait for the manager to get there to void the whole sale, and the staff have to restock the “purchase” – including meat. I was there so long, the expiration date on some my purchases passed while I was waiting.

     •  Reply
  24. Screenshot 2018 06 23 09 16 57 kindlephoto 118882666
    S.Curtis Premium Member 4 months ago

    Thank you for using the word “fewer”

     •  Reply
  25. Missing large
    strictures  4 months ago

    The worst is when you use the self checkout lane & there’s someone who doesn’t know how to use the self checkout system. But the local Sam’s Club is using the long snake line for checkouts & it was really long on Thursday.

     •  Reply
  26. Horse galloping
    backyardcowboy  4 months ago

    Don’t you mean ’Gamboling" W!ley?

     •  Reply
  27. Saywhat 2016
    Say What?  4 months ago

    Using a checkbook? Then use curbside pick-up.

     •  Reply
  28. Img 0448  2018 01 29 23 33 16 utc
    pheets  4 months ago

    Good one!

     •  Reply
  29. Missing large
    david_42  4 months ago

    Got stuck behind a guy yesterday with about 20 coupons and who had to do exact change. I only had six coupons and used my RewardsCash.

     •  Reply
  30. Missing large
    Tenner  4 months ago

    Don’t see checks much more, but now they pay cash & dig thru their purse looking for the last few pennies. One time I just dug a quarter out of my pocket and put that on the counter for them.

     •  Reply
  31. Capture  2017 12 17 08 45 35 2
    Nyckname Premium Member 4 months ago

    When I was a kid, the commissary at the base went to “form one line and wait for the next available cashier”. It took ages for the housewives to figure out that it really was faster.

     •  Reply
  32. Sjacket
    phredturner  4 months ago

    It doesnt matter. Whichever line I choose is always the slowest. I’ve resigned myself to this and no longer get upset.

     •  Reply
  33. Img 20190428 152052 hdr kindlephoto 2072758
    SusieB  4 months ago

    I have a talent for invariably picking the wrong line. It will appear to be a short line or the people in it have few items. Then suddenly there’s an issue with a credit card, a price check, etc. Maybe I should pick the the opposite line of my initial choice, like George Costanza did on Seinfeld!

     •  Reply
  34. Missing large
    FinbarMcDuff  4 months ago

    Just out of view, the “i haven’t finished shopping yet, everybody wait while I go get” customer line.

     •  Reply
  35. Missing large
    Bill The Nuke  4 months ago

    And this is usually followed by 5 minutes of ensuring that the checkbook is placed back in the exact place from which it was removed.

     •  Reply
  36. Raptor
    raptor  4 months ago

    Scan & Go – bypass the checkout lanes – show total to checkout person at door and your done.

     •  Reply
  37. Missing large
    becida  4 months ago

    The slowest line is always the one I’m in…

     •  Reply
  38. Red panda small
    Redd Panda  4 months ago

    … head down in the purse, “I know I have a nickel here, somewhere.”

     •  Reply
  39. Missing large
    Dennis Nichols  4 months ago

    Good.

     •  Reply
  40. Missing large
    tee929  4 months ago

    This will be on the FOOD CHANNEL before Valentine’s Day.

     •  Reply
  41. Bela full face
    withaG43  4 months ago

    And the slowest checker is always in the “20 items or fewer line”

     •  Reply
  42. Kirby close up with poppies behind   close cropped
    mistercatworks  4 months ago

    I noticed a lot of stores are using the “store” discount card rather than holding up lines with people going through their bags for the physical card or trying umteen different phone numbers.

     •  Reply
  43. Mecopy
    A_Dream4u  4 months ago

    Or those who still don’t know how to use a debit card after 20 years and countless coaching sessions from exasperated cashiers and customers alike. And this ALWAYS takes place in the Ahem- “Express Lane 15 items or fewer” Or the “I only bought 6 things”, but I am going to use this time to needlessly complicate this transaction by searching for coupons or ringing it up as 5 separate purchases, while haggling over the price or inane pointless chatter to keep the dozen of us behind her rolling our eyes and muttering coarse invectives under our masks! Express Lane indeed!

     •  Reply
  44.  48 chevy fleetmaster
    Jungfrau  4 months ago

    Been there, done that !

     •  Reply
  45. Nomagram
    COL Crash  4 months ago

    No matter which line I finally decide to get into, it always turns out to be the slowest moving one. What’s worse if I later decide out of frustration to jump over to a different one, that line becomes the slow one.

     •  Reply
  46. Missing large
    GreenT267  4 months ago

    If you don’t want to wait, go during off hours. Then you can shop at your leisure and actually read the ingredients and expiration dates on packages, etc. Most of us who are the normal family shoppers realize that ‘waiting’ is our choice — we can stand there and fume (raising blood pressure but not making things go faster) or we can do something — prepare to pay, check the phone, plan the rest of the errands, etc. And, the next time you get ticked off by someone taking ‘longer’ than you want, just hope that you don’t get up there and suddenly realize you forget the milk — or your debit card has slipped to the bottom of your purse — things like that happen to everyone. You just notice it when they are in front of you in line.

     •  Reply
  47. Profile msn
    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member 4 months ago

    Okay, I have been there but I noticed today that occasionally the new options take about as much time. The Apple Pay may be down, so you gotta use a card. The card slot doesn’t work so you have to slide it. None of that works and you have to get the manager. …sheesh!

     •  Reply
  48. Cgc
    chain gang charlie  4 months ago

    Most annoying…Shopping early to beat the crowd there were only six folks ahead of me, but only one checker.The wrinkled overripe tomato who thought she looked like Jane Fonda in her spandex clown suit had her cart overflowing with Items and she insisted they individually be placed in a separate bag.The checker was exasperated and embarrased.After 12 minutes and counting she called the manager for help.The line behind me grew to sixteen very angry people…They finally found someone else to open a line.When I, Finally checked out “Jane Wrinkles” was still pushing buttons on her debit card account…My total time for six items …28 minutes…Yeah and the self checkout was not up and running.Most of us were there early because we had other important things do do…Amazing how friendly we got watching that self centered hag do her “Bussiness”

     •  Reply
  49. Missing large
    forestkat2015  4 months ago

    now they hunt for their plastic card, or in the bottom of their bag for some more cash. Or — worse — they are good to go when the roving cashier wanders up to say “this machine doesn’t take credit cards”. Life

     •  Reply
  50. Missing large
    Kurt Schurenberg Premium Member 4 months ago

    It’s not just checkbooks – amazing how many people appear to be surprised that you have to pay for the items you are buying.

     •  Reply
  51. Mbsils
    marilynnbyerly  4 months ago

    I worked in concessions as a volunteer for the local theater. Six of us had 10 minutes to serve up to 300 people during intermission. Did some people think they could spend the whole 10 minutes making up their mind? Yes, they did. Was my suggestion of using electric cattle prods to speed these people along implemented? Sadly, no.

     •  Reply
  52. Missing large
    shorzy  4 months ago

    Been there done that!Wait till they then take out there change purse to count pennies or look for a pen in the purse! :-)

     •  Reply
  53. Copy of msg apa181
    The Brooklyn Accent  4 months ago

    Wow. I’ll bet Mr. Miller never expected a totally non-political cartoon to garner as many totally non-political comments as this one has!

     •  Reply
  54. April elephant 2010
    Sabrina17  4 months ago

    I worked on retail for 14 years, and so many check writers will stand there like a bump on a log until everything is rung up, then start digging for their checkbook.

     •  Reply
  55. 37cdc61d 2dfd 4a3c 9796 a93e73f76317
    MCProfessor  4 months ago

    It never fails. The line I’m in is the slowest.

     •  Reply
  56. Bluedog
    Bilan  4 months ago

    One of the good things about Walmart is that you only need to sign your check. The machine will fill out the rest. And you get to keep the check also.

     •  Reply
  57. Missing large
    Omniman  4 months ago

    Always look for the most experienced cashier. They either know what to do about “problem customers”, or they know to call the manager right away.

     •  Reply
  58. N1495118875 241922 2408
    Ermine Notyours  4 months ago

    I was delayed by a few seconds by someone paying with coins. For once I don’t mind, because we need to put more coins in circulation. Then later I held up the self-checkout line because I couldn’t get the plastic bag separated from its neighbor and opened up. Normally I would lick my finger to get some traction, but you can’t do that any more!

     •  Reply
  59. Missing large
    Doublejake Premium Member 4 months ago

    The choice between two alternatives is often phrased as a 50/50/90 proposition.

    When I make the 50/50 choice, 90% of the time it’s the wrong one.

     •  Reply
  60. Missing large
    joannesshadow  4 months ago

    Just one thing to say: remember to thank the workers at your local grocery store. They have to put up with everything you all complained about for an entire shift. Not to mention the people who won’t wear their masks properly.

     •  Reply
  61. Avatar92
    Charlie Fogwhistle  4 months ago

    How about a lane for folks buying less popular cigarettes that are kept in the locked glass case that’s 50 feet away from the nearest cash register?

     •  Reply
  62. Tumblr mbbz3vrusj1qdlmheo1 250
    Night-Gaunt49  4 months ago

    You left out self service.

     •  Reply
  63. Mr natural
    Oldgrowth  4 months ago

    Most of the stores, and certainly grocery stores here, have multiple self-serve stations and way fewer live cashier lanes. Both staff and customers (self-included) have learned lots about using them. One soon learns to check an item for a UPC when you pick it up. The thing I still have trouble with is produce, which is surprisingly complex and detailed. It’s not just a Tomato – is it Roma, cherry, vine-ripened, organic, or?… My first job sixty years ago was bagging groceries (for $.65 p.hr.), and how to do that well has come back.

     •  Reply
  64. Yellow submarine
    spaced man spliff Premium Member 4 months ago

    No one brought up the little mom and pop stores that cannot change even a fiver. I know. Ran into a lot of those when I lived in San Francisco 50 years ago.

     •  Reply
  65. Toughcat
    bakana  4 months ago

    Murphy Guarantees it.

     •  Reply
  66. 690904ef 1e7c 4d36 a98a f46b185ca15f
    DCBakerEsq  4 months ago

    The trouble is always other people.

     •  Reply
  67. Missing large
    JH&Cats  4 months ago

    Wiley, they can’t crowd together nose to tail like that anymore. Our markets have signs “stay behind this line until the person ahead has left.”

     •  Reply
  68. Kirby close up with poppies behind   close cropped
    mistercatworks  4 months ago

    I don’t like waiting extra minutes for someone at an espresso bar to get some elaborate coffee-flavored milk drink. I want my straight espresso and I want it now. :)

     •  Reply
  69. Missing large
    James Allion  4 months ago

    I haven’t had a physical check book for at least 15years!

     •  Reply
  70. Missing large
    jbruins84341  4 months ago

    Nice job, Wiley, for saying, “20 items OR FEWER.” So many people get it wrong, and grocery stores don’t help. Thank you.

     •  Reply
  71. George jetson
    Bicycle Dude  4 months ago

    Recently, a 20-something gal was gripping, as she dug through her purse for exact change, how she hated being a girl!

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement