Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for October 28, 2020

I doubt the horses will turn on them, and the cows don’t have carnivore teeth, but they can still do some damage.

on two the wranglers shout “yaw!” and skedaddle!

What about the omnivores?

We’re omnivores. Do the cowboys stay the same, or start to get really really hungry.

An old cowboy went riding out one dark and windy day

Upon a ridge he rested as he went along his way

When all at once a mighty herd of red eyed cows he saw

A-plowing through the ragged sky and up the cloudy draw

Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel

Their horns were black and shiny and their hot breath he could feel

A bolt of fear went through him as they thundered through the sky

For he saw the riders coming hard and he heard their mournful cry…

If people could get useful nutrition from grass, that would be useful during the pandemic.

All us omnivores will become vorenioms?

And they died out quickly because their teeth and digestive systems weren’t equipped to handle that sudden change.

MacDonalds will have to start selling two patties with a bun between them…

Seems only reasonable, to me.

He has not started the count yet, has He!?!

He’s always been a practical Joker!

Tis the Almighty’s sense of humor wherein the least shall be the most once in a while. Gad, you gotta have a funny bone if you made man in your image.

I’m good. I’m a coffeenivore (whatever).

This is supposed to be funny?

Mankind often wonders aloud whether God might have made a mistake or two. Wonder if Buttercup’s father ever had that feeling?

We’re omnivores anyway, so no change there.

A thousand years later…. “ONE”…

I’m eating vegan now.

They’re delicious.

I like a deity with a sense of humor. An ironic deity? Not so much. On a related thought, I wonder if God speaks with a southern drawl sometimes.

And since there is ten times as many new carnivores as herbivores, the herbivores are wiped out and the carnivores eat each other. This explains the great extinctions, without resorting to silly ideas like rocks falling from the sky!

This would answer the theological question that has always plagued (pun intended) man:

If there is a God, what would s/he do if quarantined and got bored?

….and all the smarty pants will become silly dummies!

Does that mean that Wileys bears are going vegan?

That’s a bunch of bull.

Perhaps this is how it all started: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-10-28/cow-eating-snake-photos-outback-australia/12822382

what is this… a quentin tarantino flic?

Buffalo will come back! But they’ll be seeking revenge. Only Ted Turner will get a pass.

Well, (s)he didn’t say anything about reversing domestication, so now it’s a bunch giant cats and dogs. Humans seem to do quite well with carnivorous pets.

Finally, comeuppance.

Chuck (God) from SUPERNATURAL is up to no good again.

Meanwhile, the vegetables would like to talk to the hand.

Not to get religious – but it is ironic that the comic uses “God” as the source of the change since it is the Bible that says, “God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.” That sort of turns this into a “PSYCHE!” Situation of epic proportions.

forget it he’s sending an asteroid to take us down before the election :p

Now it begins …

In the Bible supposedly before the Fall all animals ate plants. After the Fall all things became as we know them. And after the mass slaughter of JHVH’s wrath are killed then the old Earth and Heaven will be swept away and replaced. And I suppose all animals will eat plants again, both lion and goat will eat the same food.

Though before that the order to work with humanity will be rescinded so that every animal will be hostile to humanity and attack.

Won’t that be fun?

Wiley cows? i love it!

I don’t get it????

And thus the first stampede was born.

Cowabunga that would create a horse of a different colour!

One of the biggest jokes he pulled on one of his followers was the guy he told to kill his son. He was about to do it when God suddenly stops him pretty much saying he was just joking.

Herd mentality/immunity.