Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for March 30, 2020

  1. Birthcontrol
    Dtroutma  over 2 years ago

    Be prepared!

     •  Reply
  2. Ufo not
    mr_sherman Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Or a five foot Irishman.

     •  Reply
  3. 595536163836702
    stellanova87  over 2 years ago

    If it wasn’t for my kids I would swear I have been social distancing my whole life.

     •  Reply
  4. Grog poop
    GROG Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Mines double that.

     •  Reply
  5. Badger 4 360
    sirbadger  over 2 years ago

    For sneezes, you’re going to need a longer pole.

     •  Reply
  6. Edb4beaa 19ab 437d a460 cf4fba2a5e74
    syzygy47  over 2 years ago

    Social distancing with what Jeff Dunham’s Jose Jalepeno would say, a steeeek.

     •  Reply
  7. Brain guy dancing hg clr
    Concretionist  over 2 years ago

    I’ve been very surprised how much I miss being able to just go into town (only a couple of miles) to buy a widgit for my next project. The other day, the toilet seat hinge failed. I’m not going to go buy a replacement until it doesn’t feel like taking my life in my hands… so we’re using it very carefully!

     •  Reply
  8. Smokeystover  2
    gbars70  over 2 years ago

    I dunno, I’m a 6 foot pole and I’m pretty friendly.

     •  Reply
  9. Img 20220429 172951833 2
    kaffekup   over 2 years ago

    “You adults get offa my lawn!

     •  Reply
  10. Sammy on gocomics
    Say What Now‽ Premium Member over 2 years ago

    I’ve been practicing social isolation for decades.

     •  Reply
  11. 654px red eyed tree frog   litoria chloris edit1
    Superfrog  over 2 years ago

    That’s nothing to sneeze at.

     •  Reply
  12. 1628996 t1
    enigmamz  over 2 years ago

    A man ahead of his time.

     •  Reply
  13. 45732a
    Sanspareil  over 2 years ago

    Bucky Katt’s anti social network seems a brilliant scheme in the light of hindsight!

     •  Reply
  14. Missing large
    eastern.woods.metal  over 2 years ago

    Stay safe, everyone. We WILL get through this

     •  Reply
  15. Out little avatar
    dadoctah  over 2 years ago

    Social distancing still isn’t very social.

     •  Reply
  16. Get smart shoe phone
    gopher gofer  over 2 years ago

    i love social distancing – it’s just a shame that folks can’t be even more distant…

     •  Reply
  17. Camera1 016
    keenanthelibrarian  over 2 years ago

    Never thought of that – might work …

     •  Reply
  18. Profile 6
    dot-the-I  over 2 years ago

    Dear could up the caliber by installing a toilet plunger on the tip.

     •  Reply
  19. Atheism15
    INGSOC   over 2 years ago

    Go go gadget arms..

     •  Reply
  20. B3b2b771 4dd5 4067 bfef 5ade241cb8c2
    cdward  over 2 years ago

    His moment has come.

     •  Reply
  21. Img 0121
    saltylife16  over 2 years ago

    He’s keeping it real

     •  Reply
  22. Calvin   hobbes   playtime in snow avatar flipped
    Andrew Sleeth Premium Member over 2 years ago

    To be wielded effectively, I estimate the pole would need to be between 14 to 15 feet long, assuming uniform weight throughout its length.

    [ ps — My comment should make it obvious that I don’t need to socially distance myself; others do it for me. ]

     •  Reply
  23. Missing large
    eastern.woods.metal  over 2 years ago

    It won’t be long until " they " introduce a colour coded star to wear. GREEN means you’ve had and are immune and can socialize and go to work. YELLOW means you haven’t had it and haven’t been tested. RED means you’re infected now

     •  Reply
  24. Neuman
    rmercer Premium Member over 2 years ago

    For keeping scientists away, you’ll need a 3-meter pole.

     •  Reply
  25. No 45
    Masterskrain Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Well, with the blistering incompetence coming from our “leadership” (HA!) in Washington, we have to take matters into our own hands, and yes, this also includes having the ability to laugh, however ironically at the mess we are in. BUT, yes, we will get through it in time, not because of “The Administration”, but rather IN SPITE of it!

     •  Reply
  26. Fb img 1509486198333
    e.groves  over 2 years ago

    How does this social distancing work? The parking lot at Walmart has been full every weekend.

     •  Reply
  27. Profile msn
    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member over 2 years ago

    True, that. Though I suppose this is the time when being introverted really comes in handy. I’m not lonely. I’m alone. …sigh

     •  Reply
  28. Crankyc
    franki_g  over 2 years ago

    I went out once, after 8 days. I was going to shower 1st but then thought it would make more sense to shower AFTER.and besidesit contributes to social distancing. Even the blithe won’t get too close if I smell, um, natural. Think of all the mouthwash I can save, too!

    Social stinkage!

     •  Reply
  29. 2006 afl collingwood
    nosirrom  over 2 years ago

    I have an industrial N95 mask that I bought 5 or 6 years ago because I was sanding joint compound. It’s been very effective at making people social distance me at the supermarket.

     •  Reply
  30. Snoopy laughs
    HappyDog{㋡ ᴮᵒᶻᵒ ᵉᵛᵉʳʸ ᵈᵃʸ☂} Premium Member over 2 years ago

    I wonder how many times the curmudgeon has replaced the front window after wielding his 10 foot pole?

     •  Reply
  31. Mr haney
    NeedaChuckle Premium Member over 2 years ago

    I get the mail the next day and wash well after touching it.

     •  Reply
  32. Missing large
    rickseg  over 2 years ago

    Dress riiiiight . . . DRESS!!

     •  Reply
  33. Photo
    Nate England  over 2 years ago

    I’m a gamer. I’ve been social distancing for years and people have always mocked me for it. WHO’S LAUGHING NOW?

     •  Reply
  34. 7a3d35b05103496eecec311170ba260d
    Pickled Pete  over 2 years ago

    Example of social distancing:

    “If you see me coming, better step aside. A lotta men didn’t, a lotta men died.”

    — Tennessee Ernie Ford

     •  Reply
  35. No 45
    Masterskrain Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Living in the country on the Kentucky/ Tennessee State line, over 20 miles from a town of less then 6000 makes it really easy for me to practice social distancing. I’ve been doing it for years!

     •  Reply
  36. Missing large
    r413j731  over 2 years ago

    Brilliant

     •  Reply
  37. Pirate63
    Linguist  over 2 years ago

    Curmudgeons of the World, UNITE!

     •  Reply
  38. Missing large
    the lost wizard  over 2 years ago

    Can’t touch this.

     •  Reply
  39. Img 0306
    Vangoghdog01  over 2 years ago

    Next steps: Dig up the yard for a mine field and razor wire on top of and behind the fence.

     •  Reply
  40. Pirate63
    Linguist  over 2 years ago

    As I mentioned elsewhere, yesterday…

    I swear to God, if I see one more notice or hear one more talking head tell me to “Wash Your Hands”, I shall personally hunt that person down and throttle them with my over-sanitized, super scrubbed hands!

    I will, of course, after the satisfactory strangulation, make sure I properly wash my hands…

     •  Reply
  41. Missing large
    SunflowerGirl100  over 2 years ago

    Is he named Ove?

     •  Reply
  42. One in a million
    Frankie Harvey-Shea  over 2 years ago

    Rats! And here I thought I was ahead of my time.

     •  Reply
  43. N1495118875 241922 2408
    Ermine Notyours  over 2 years ago

    Can he get the mail with that stick? That’s what I thought before I read the caption.

     •  Reply
  44. Coexist
    Bookworm  over 2 years ago

    Instead of Social Distancing, which seems to bother people, why don’t we call it Asocial Mingling? (They’re both oxymorons, so what the heck.)

     •  Reply
  45. Missing large
    marko92752  over 2 years ago

    This current situation reminds me of I Robot by Isaac Asimov where people socialize only over the internet and dread actual contact with other people.

     •  Reply
  46. Facepalm bear 2
    Lablubber   over 2 years ago

    Hey you kids. Get off everyone’s lawn.

     •  Reply
  47. Fullsizeoutput 95f
    waltermatera  over 2 years ago

    I have considered curmidging on occasion . . .

     •  Reply
  48. Image002
    hsawlrae  over 2 years ago

    With a 10 foot pole by a 5 foot Russian.

     •  Reply
  49. 690904ef 1e7c 4d36 a98a f46b185ca15f
    DCBakerEsq  over 2 years ago

    I’ve enjoyed social distancing for years now.

     •  Reply
  50. Img 20170504 193919352
    chief  over 2 years ago

    That’s me, a curmudgeon. I have a doormat that says “Go Away!”

     •  Reply
  51. Kirby close up with poppies behind   close cropped
    mistercatworks  over 2 years ago

    I see that in Nepal they are using the “ten-foot pole” to keep a good distance from suspects. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSc7FJFk_8U

     •  Reply
  52. Hat large square
    Cactus-Pete  over 2 years ago

    Why do cartoonists so often draw the mailbox flag upside down?

     •  Reply
  53. Missing large
    claudia.sawyer  over 2 years ago

    No hugs, no hand shaking?Heaven!

     •  Reply
  54. Toughcat
    bakana  over 2 years ago

    I’d say more of a Misanthrope than a Curmudgeon.

    Although the two do tend to occur as a Pair most of the time.

     •  Reply
  55. Doctor strange color 756863
    thedogesl Premium Member over 2 years ago

    True pioneers get no respect! (:-)

     •  Reply
  56. Lula1
    fairportfan  over 2 years ago

    Watch out for that eleven-foot Lithuanian, though.

     •  Reply
  57. Fox spirit animal 3
    eddi_tbh  over 2 years ago

    Some people saw this coming. Some people just don’t like other people.

     •  Reply
  58. Missing large
    Ukko wilko  over 2 years ago

    I got my curmudgeon certificate years ago.

     •  Reply
  59. Ellipsis
    suñña  over 2 years ago

    Wladislaw Podolsky, a ten-foot Pole, said he didn’t want to touch the guy, either.

     •  Reply
  60. Missing large
    dsjwriter  over 2 years ago

    Social distancing means that people who work for firms such as Gallup or Zogby have to conduct 10-foot polls,

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Non Sequitur