Trout – thanks for the recommendations. I will check these out.
I used to read a lot of science fiction – I love early Heinlein, up to Stranger in a Strange Land – but after that I think he gets a little mannered and repetitive. I just finished rereading (for the upteenth time) Citizen of the Galaxy – what a great book!! I grew up reading Asimov and Arthur Clarke and Farmer and Le Guin and Sturgeon and gosh lots and lots. Do you read Philip K. Dick? He’s uneven, but at his best he’s quite remarkable. His non-science-fiction novel The Confessions of a bleeep Artist is one of my favorite books of all time. Also Lem’s Solaris – I haven’t read his other books, but I intend to. Silverberg at times, but he wrote so much, and not all of it is good. But all of this is now very old – I feel out of touch with the newer writers.
I understand fear of success. I sometimes think I live precariously balanced between fear of success and fear of failure. But as I age, I think I’m less worried about how I appear to others, and that makes life a little easier.