Dumbwich Castle by Lord Birthday for February 08, 2017

Transcript:

12 reasons you should feel good about yourself (despite everything) I am a fool Yes, but you are taller than a flea 1. You are taller than a flea! What joy this news brings! 2. You are stronger than most birds. Such a orioles! 3. You can do many things with apples. Like bite them! 4. Your skull contains a big grey raisin. A brain! 5. You are nicer than the sportsman named Laird who stole my deepest lover. What the crud, Laird! 6. You are fitter than a forest hog. It's like a pig in the woods! 7. You smell better than a beach diaper. Hot dang! 8. You are younger than the pyramids. In Egypt! 9. Your body exudes the pilgrim's spirit. I am serious! 10. You can remember the moon's real name ("Moon")! 11. You are wiser than a dairy spoon. Oh give us new truth! 12. You used to be an embryo. Now = a bank teller!