The Dinette Set by Julie Larson for October 01, 2022

Brain bleach please—for my eyes!

There truly is a sucker born every minute.

It lubes your thighs so they won’t make that ugly squealing noise when you walk

Did she ever have bird legs when she was in school?

☜ (↼_↼)

Need that Vic Tanny machine, with the vibrating belt…..

There’s an 18 wheeler pulling up outside with the daily supply.

…you can take the thighs out of the thunder, but you can’t take the thunder out of the thighs?

Industrial quantities. And not even then… But you can pick up a trick mirror to monitor your progress.

There used to be a rap song called Back that azz up. I bet Burl knows it well.

The only thing that cream will make smaller is your bank account.

Surprised she would buy the phony cream

Well, at least it stops that annoying corduroy sound her loose cellulite makes when she walks. Spluddarup…spluddarup…spluddarup…

A fool and his or her money are soon parted.

Then get a magnifying glass…

I am not proud to admit that I sometimes find myself searching for the “find it” even on days when there is not one.

It might work….if she stops eating while she’s waiting.