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Dilbert Classics by Scott Adams for February 24, 2021

49 Comments

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  1. Grog   droob color
    GROG Premium Member 3 months ago

    Obviously bised toward stupidity.

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  2. Groucho
    Jayalexander  3 months ago

    Wish I’d taken shop. I measure twice, cut twice and then rasp it a bit before I get out the wood putty.

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    gsawyer101  3 months ago

    Sign in “Hometown” Ben’s shop… “Measure once cuss twice”

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  4. 3083024 0826053922 daveb
    Kaputnik  3 months ago

    I measure twice, get two different results, measure a third time, still comes out different, begin to think that the tape measure is messing with my head.

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  5. Beaker collar
    Beaker  3 months ago

    I measured and cut this board twice and it’s still too short.

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  6. Large gandalf
    Gandalf  3 months ago

    Reminds me of the old Böll short story, ’Action Will Be Taken ’.

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  7. Tom ter
    pathamil  3 months ago

    Measure it with a micrometer, mark it with chalk, then cut it with an axe…

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  8. Intraining
    InTraining  3 months ago

    OMG… Wally had an idea,…?

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  9. Profile msn
    vaughnrl2003 Premium Member 3 months ago

    When I “think outside of the box”, I’m considered rebellious. When I “push the envelope” I ricochet into disaster. So after lunch I just go back to my desk and plan my vacation.

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  10. Awatchdog 2
    Watchdog  3 months ago

    I saw exactly that poster in a federal government contracting office

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  11. Thumbnail img 0108
    Jeffin Premium Member 3 months ago

    My contractor always said measure twice, cut one. He was so gross.

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  12. Led001d
    Tentoes  3 months ago

    Measure twice, cut once, cry, go back to the hardware store.

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    Thinkingblade  3 months ago

    I worked for a company who had a targeted Leadership behavior that was something like – “Leaders make things go fast”. Interpret how you will …

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  14. Guitar in window
    jscarff57 Premium Member 3 months ago

    I think it should say, “measure once, cut twice, repeat…”

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  15. Kirby close up with poppies behind   close cropped
    mistercatworks  3 months ago

    I’ve mentioned this before but I worked for a Swiss multinational branch in the U.S.. During a “quality awareness drive”, the company put up expensive four-color posters all around the site. Unfortunately, the word “professionalism” was mis-hyphenated on the poster. See, quality is in the details .

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    DCBakerEsq  3 months ago

    “Action” is my middle name. But “stoopid” is my nickname.

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  17. Abcd3
    redback  3 months ago

    managers are not the ones that get the work done, and if there is nothing accountable to show, is them who look bad even if they add no value to the product or the process, so design phase where there is nothing tangible looks bad. Better just do something as long as there is something to show, even if the result is crap. If the result is crap is because the people who actually do something are incompetents, but the managers did their job

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  18. Wizanim
    ChessPirate  3 months ago

    Another from the Tao of Wally: “Our Actions Will Get Many Re-Actions”…

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    garysee  3 months ago

    Measuriing twice and cutting once is fine with woodworking and such, but it doesn’t apply (or shouldn’t) in programming. “Cutting” is actually cheaper and more efficient than “measuring”.

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    Buckeye67  3 months ago

    A “Don’t Think Before You Act” poster may have reflected the PHB’s message more concisely.

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  21. Missing large
    STACEY MARSHALL Premium Member 3 months ago

    Think once, screw up twice.

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  22. Toughcat
    bakana  3 months ago

    Don’t forget the Classic: “Even a Dead Cat is right twice a day”.

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  23. Thinker
    Sisyphos  3 months ago

    Poor, dumb PHB doesn’t even recognize this reversal of the old textile industry adage! No matter, This company is doomed to perpetual failure in any case.

    P.S. Bravo, Wally; you win again!

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  24. Aoh14gh hxej9ym6f aqkeltswtfhqvu4y3ngmnlsscepw
    Santaanacanyon1  3 months ago

    lmao!

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