Cul de Sac by Richard Thompson for July 03, 2011
Alice: Agh - ewegh - yuck! Petey: They're just cicadas, Alice. You're the one who's not afraid of anything. Alice: But these're bugs, with all those legs. EURGH. They're scary. Petey: Do what I do. Construct a distancing fantasy as a coping mechanism. Alice: Do what? Petey: I simply imagine the cicadas are my own private army of tiny Mothras all eager to do my bidding. They're instantly transformed from red-eyed monsters into my little pals! Alice: AH. Petey: What is - Alice: Look! I've dressed the cicadas in cute little dresses made of paper napkins! Ha-ha! Who could be scared of that? Help me write their names on them. This one's Darlene. Petey: Yikes! They've found cicadas around here wearing strange paper outfits, suggesting a possible species of super-intelligent cicadas. And they all had girls' names, too. Mom: EWGH! Don't tell the kids. It'll just scare them.