Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for May 25, 2012

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak-Comix Edited by Ruben Bolling Andy Boy: Andy, there's a new kid at Glendale High! Andy: Gosh! She's black, lesbian and differently disabled! Andy: We'll treat you just like one of the gang! Girl: I also have a D.H.D, I'm a vegan and a district court judge! Darthfield John: Darthfield, why do you hate Mondays? Darthfield: It was on a Monday that I killed thousands, embraced evil and caused my wife's death. John: Oh. And why do you love lasagna? Darthfield: Because it's delicious. Superhero Fantasies For The Middle-Aged Hero: SMASH! Hero: SMASH! Cable Woman: Oh, your account number was wrong. OK, your cable is back on. Hero: Thank you. Sexist Comments, Saved SECURITY Man: Never get in line behind women... Crowd: WHAT?! Man: Because men are CRAZY and STUPIDLY COMPETITIVE, so they move fast! Woman: Oh true. Percival Dunwoody, Idiot Time Traveler From 1909 Percival: Honey, I'm back from the future. WHAT'S THIS?? Percival: You fool! I'm YOU! Percival: I don't care! I'll KILL you! Percival: GASP! Percival: This is MY chance to escape! Percival: Stay still, damn you! "Lucky Ducky" European Edition PATO AFORTUNADO 1999 Hound: Willkommen to der Euro! Lucky Ducky: Gracias, Heinrich Hund. ESPANA Hound: Ve vill now make der huge capital infusions! Lucky Ducky: ¡Si! ESPANA 2008 Hound: Ach! There is now a crisis! Ve vill draw all capital out! Lucky Ducky: ¡Uy! 2012 Lucky Ducky: Necisito un bailout, por favor. Hound: "PATO AFORTUNADO" FIN