Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for March 13, 2012

It’s a bad idea at any time, even if it isn’t apples to oranges.

Orange you glad you left her?

She just rolled away.

Aw, c’mon, Honeygold, you know you’re the apple of my eye.

She’s just a little tart! I found her a-peelin’ one day, and I had to look — but she’s already gone to seed now.

Don’t you remember that I picked you the moment I saw you?

We’ve been hanging together ever since, haven’t we?

Aw….are you blushing? You’re so sweet!

He loved your navel, but this new girl is a real pip!!

You know, I don’t think this guy’s very picky. He’ll pear up with anyone.

Please s pear us

She’s very a-peel-ing.

^ So the old girlfriend has a certain zest….

By the looks of her eyes, I would guess she’s a crab apple.

all fruity, yes, but no nuts.

She looks like “Tammy Tangerine” from ATHF . . .

I have a feeling that things are about to go pear-shaped.

The apple of any mans’ eye is the cutest peach with the biggest pear……………..

Aw, Number Six…Undeserved, but THANK YOU!!

Besides you look way better when I’m around. Now you have a nice pear.