New Adventures of Queen Victoria by Pab Sungenis for August 02, 2011

does anyone play that anymore? i thought that moo, mud, or zork died in 1997

Take the Magic Bridge!

I’m confused, bewildered and befuddled, again.

I would adore hanging out with Oscar. Just no Bosie, please. He can be a killjoy.

Whew! Withdrawal is over!

For the confused : HRM is playing an old text-based adventure game. Look up “Zork” on Wikipedia, and there were quite a few of them like this…

Golden Wombat of Destiny is another one like this

E, S, S, S, N, E, N, E, NW.THE PIRATE’S TREASURE CHEST IS HERE!

The “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” game had a nasty feature:

< north> You can’t go that way.< north> You can’t go that way.< north> I said, you can’t go that way.< north> OK, I lied.

@Baslim: You killed a little dwarf. The body vanishes in a cloud of greasy black smoke.

At least Vicki got rid of her Radio Shack computer.

PLUGH

Oh, no!!! Not Oscar!

which way to the Wumpus woom?

Reminds me of a scene from “The Big Bang Theory,” where Sheldon is playing a similar game:

“Hit troll with axe!”

“Hit troll with axe!”

“Hit troll with axe!”

“My word, this is one tough troll.”

>inventoryYou have a hamster, a paint canvas, one tube of paint, muffins, an axe, and an expired Boston subway pass.>throw axe at oscar wildeYou miss. The only effect is that Oscar Wilde is pouting now.>look at paintWhich paint do you want to look at?>look at tube of paintIt is an ordinary tube of oil paint. The color is “dorian gray”.>paint oscar wildeOscar Wilde moves away from you when you try to paint him.>paint a portrait of oscar wildeI see no brush here.>use hamster as brushThe hamster violently objects.>feed muffins to hamsterThe hamster happily eats the muffins and goes to sleep.>use hamster as brushThe hamster does not object to being covered in oil paint.>paint a portrait of oscar wildeYou paint Oscar Wilde’s portrait in dorian gray.>show portrait to oscar wildeThat has no effect.>get axeTaken.>hit portrait with axeYou tear the portrait.>show portrait to oscar wildeOscar Wilde pouts more deeply. Only his feelings are hurt.You have just wasted valuable time and resources trying to kill Oscar Wilde when you could have just said “Excuse me” and walked by him.You have been eaten by a grue.

I understand young men were what made Oscar Wilde.

Pusilarminous polecat!

Ok, I know I’m late on this but here’s my command after Oscar Wilde shows up… “Change wallpaper”

It’s been a while, but I think it went:> hang gown over hole > put towel over drain > put box in front of hatch > put mail on box > press babel fish dispenser button